What up?
How can I help?
Not much just angry today
What's fueling the fire there Gigi?
I don’t know I just feel so alone! My husband is hard on me and calls me names. I already feel a big enough loser on my own
That's abusive behavior as you know. We Def tend to screw things up pretty good when we are drinking which makes keeping healthy relationships almost impossible. Either you will prove him wrong and regain his trust (unless he's not worth it) or you will out grow him. Give yourself a chance to find out in sobriety. It takes time.
He did myth at a teen and knows what a substance hold does on you. Any time I say have a little companion he says well I got over it. I dunno maybe I don’t deserve any
I suggest reading More About Alcoholism in the big book. Also read pages 85-88 in the morning and at night for morning and evening prayer and meditation and write a list of all the things you did while drinking that upset you...it will help you digest step one which is about our powerlessness when it comes to alcohol.