120 days sober! I’m trying hard to see the positives during such a difficult time for me.
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A suggestion could be, make a gratitude list. Things like your health, kids, job, etc. Every time you need positives pull out that list. Helps keeping the things you are grateful for in the forefront. And wow, just seems like yesterday you got sober. Huge congratulations!!!
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Yes Desiree! This is fabulous! Also, the gratitude list can be huge for keeping things in right perspective. You have so much good going, keep it going!
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But being the victim feels so justified. Lol this is hard. Especially when you guys give me good suggestions.
Thanks Jenn! You are so supportive! Thank you 1000 times over!
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Dam that’s a tough statement. How can being victimized be justified? You really need to change that mindset. Dead end thinking.
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Just be patient. We want everything to be fixed right away when we get sober. We (I) spent a long time fu(king things up. They take a while to get un-fu(ked when we get sober. If you hang in there and stay sober (and work the steps😉) little by little a life more stunning than you can imagine is possible. A new life filled with daily gifts.
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I was being facetious. I don’t really think that. Although my sponsor did say that sometimes we dwell on things because it’s easier to be the victim than it is to do the work to move past it and that sometimes we do this to feel justified in drinking.
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Got ya. Understood. Thought you meant your ex was still doing what he did and continuing to do stuff. My bad. Just glad you got a sponsor and staying the path. Again, huge congratulations. Definitely a miracle.
Desiree how was your detox? Did you throw up and sh*t yourself for 3 days while freezing and sweating and being unable to sleep, eat, or drink even water? Did just the thought of brushing your teeth make you dry heave? And did you shake so hard it took 2 hands to get the key in the ignition so you could go to work in absolute agony and misery? Did your kids have to make themselves sandwiches and eat cold pizza because you could not do anything except cry and try to convince yourself not to drink?
If you didn’t have feelings like those yet, maybe I can save you from that. If you did, maybe I can remind you that each successive detox tends to get worse.
You want to know what I’m grateful for? I’m grateful that I remember the unequalled misery that drinking brought into my life, and the subsequent joy that fit back in my life once the drinking was removed.
Call your sponsor. Write the list. Help a newcomer. Make the coffee. Chair a meeting. Hug your kids. Love the possibilities of an amazing life to come.
Do it sober.
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There’s no hurry in recovery. Just knowing that no matter what happens, don’t drink and don’t drug. Do you feel better physically? Think clearer. Have more $$. No hangovers. Remember everything now, etc etc etc. Work your program, don’t drink/use, and help others. The happy, joyous and free will show up.
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