3rd day sick as a dog can't sleep or eat went to get a pk.cigaretts today maybe the fresh air will help it crossed my mind maybe a shot will help just 1 made ot back home with 70 dollars from Dollar General & 2 pack of cigarettes?????
2 Likes
Robin, I rarely get on here so only just now saw your post. I genuinely empathize! In what you describe, it takes one to know one. It's like we find ourselves in a bad dream, thoughts racing - except there's awful physical suffering with sweating, nausea and/or dry heaves and diarrhea as bonus features!!! I do not s##t you when I declare and promise: Just as grim, horrible and black as these few days may be..... To that exact same extent will it all be spun into gold for you!!!
In my experience, the answer lies in taking the twelve steps. Meetings, gratitude lists, "playing the tape forward" etc. have their place. But they mean jack
s##t unless you take the 12 steps. Going to meetings without taking the steps is like going to the ER but never leaving the waiting room.
Taking the 12 steps is what creates the need for a sponsor. You need to get a sponsor. Sponsor's role is to take you through the steps, period. So it's important that who you choose as a sponsor has taken all 12 steps and is conversant about them.
Getting from puking and shaking "where the streets have no name" to the point of finding a sponsor likely can't happen without the passage of a few days. It takes a minute to go to some meetings. To find someone you like well enough - and have confidence they have taken and are conversant in all 12 steps - to ask them to sponsor you and to get down with your journey. PLEASE FOLLOW THIS PATH TO BEGIN FINDING RELEASE.
So - what do you do during the early days before you've hooked up with a sponsor? My personal experience suggests as follows: 1) Pray ceaselessly. Doesn't matter whether or whatever you believe. Pray. Just pray. You shall be surprised! 2) Remember, THIS TOO SHALL PASS. 3) Repeat the following mantra silently to yourself - " "We don't (drink) (use). PERIOD." "We don't (drink) (use). PERIOD." "We don't (drink) (use). PERIOD." Say it OVER AND OVER AND OVER. For the brief few days before connecting with a sponsor, please do these three things relentlessly. Keep in mind - your very life depends on it. No BS. You're trying to save your life. You're trying to
save your life!!!
While you're still in the weeds, I repeat: If you do these things, you will in due time sit up surprised with a start - suddenly realizing you're happier than you've ever been! You'll have an undeniable, palpable and vivid sense - LIFE IS A BLAST!!!
Very warmest regards to you, Robin.
-- Jim
4 Likes
Robin, I’ve been where you are at countless times! That 1 more shot just to feel a little relief always roped me in to another drink and another. Total nightmare😱
I finally got help and medically detoxed, which was not fun either.
I decided I was never going to put myself in that situation again! So I got super serious about MY SOBER PROGRAM.
The best cure for a hangover is to not take that 1st drink.
I’m here if you want to talk.
2 Likes
You'll feel better after a while. The single shot is not going to be your last. It's when we've had ENOUGH that we officially quit, but hey, prove me wrong!
1 Like
Hope you’re feeling better. Drink lots of water, electrolytes and try to eat.
1 Like
Just Wow!..Over all the years, those were probably some of the best words, and greatest advice I've ever heard!.. Like the old expression goes, I'm glad you're on our side Mr Jim!
TEAM SOBER?..lol
1 Like
Do whatever you need to stay sober one hour at a time. The game is 24! Sleep if you must- read, walk, heck cry if that helps! Play the game & don’t drink. One is too many & a thousand will never be enough. Great job making it back home with that money in your pocket & 2 packs of cigs. Get a sponsor too!
1 Like
I definitely know how you feel. It was extremely hard for me. I was like you thinking ok just one shot! As we know one leads to two and so on. It is a never ending process. I commend you for getting past that moment. Utilize the twelve steps, your network . You always want to do that before picking up. The saying " THIS TOO SHALL PASS" is something I say almost daily in many situations in my life. You can overcome this . It does get easier as time goes on. Always hear if you need anything. I am proud of you!!
Thanks for sharing your struggles. After two years my default it to use when I’m uncomfortable. I know that it’s not going to help me today. Cause when I use I blow my life up for a short term solution. 1 is too many and a 1000 never enough. Play it out in your head what happens when you use. This always helps me. You did good getting fresh air. This shows you are trying something different to feel better. Go to a meeting and talk about it with people who understand and can support you!! Sending you some good healing vibes 
🩷