Advice and encouragement

Recovery
#1

long post

Good morning, everyone.
I'm in need of advice for a current event I plan on attending. For context, before my sobriety journey, I had not been sober for a full 24 hours for almost 3 years. My drugs of choice were Alcohol and benadryl, preferably at the same time. As of today, I am 25 days sober of both, I am grateful i haven't had withdrawal issues or many cravings. I sleep better at night, and my mood is better during the day.

My dilemma is this. My friends didn't take me saying I have a problem serious enough to notice or understand. All of my friends drink, and we would always go shot for shot. I have not been around them for about 2 months and have not disclosed my journey. Sunday is my best friend of 20 years' birthday party. And Alcohol will definitely be in attendance, Sunday is also my mother's birthday, she passed in February. My emotions have been a little high this week as the day gets closer. I want to attend my best friends party because she is the one who always shows up for me and I don't want to be alone that day but I also don't want to feel the burden of explaining why I'm not drinking. On the other hand, i do not want to be tempted to drink, thinking it will take the edge off of how i may be feeling at the time.

Have any of you been faced with a similar issue, what helped you cope in the environment you were in. All advice and healing energy welcomed.
Thanks for reading!

2 Likes
#2

If they were not good enough friends to support u and cause u stress in a situation cut them the muck off quick . Ur sobriety comes first not a party or a friendship . Don't misplace loyalty . U don't owe them anything real friends would have tried to pull u up not keep handing u shots

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#3

I’ve learned that I had to walk away from Everything that no longer served my purpose - staying sober

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#4

I hear you on this one. It’s tough when it’s not just about saying no to a drink, it’s protecting everything you’ve been working for. If you do decide to go, plan your exit ahead of time, have your own drink in hand, and maybe line up a sober friend you can text during it. It’s also completely okay to skip this year if it feels too risky. Your real friends will still be there when you’re stronger.

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#5

This is what my therapist told me to do.

#6

I definitely had to step away from all acquaintances and friends that drank and did drugs..i wouldn't have been able to stay sober in a drinking environment..if ur sobriety is important..i know it comes first for me, u need to put it before a party..take an alcohol-free drink with u..they have all kinds of mocktails..tell ur friends ur not drinking..many prayers.

#7

The fact is only you know if you truly want to stay sober or not sweetie and unfortunately booze is every where so pray about going before you go and you have to set boundaries for your self and your friends need to respect them personally I have been clean almost a year and I know it's dangerous to put myself at a party where everyone will be drinking... especially when it's near the anniversary of loosing my mom cause loosing my mother was the hardest pain I've ever walked threw...so please pray hard before you go k

#8

Go with someone who is also sober, for accountability and if your friend ask why your not drinking tell me it's out of respect for the sober friend

#9

I posted an update, everything went well! Still sober