After almost 6 weeks: I broke it. I was on a date, I had three glasses of wine and one cigarette. I don't like it, I feel terrible for sliding back. I wish I could tell people that I don't want to drink and still hangout
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Ah man you were doing so good. Jump right back in to it and don’t look back. Every day there can be a new “day one”
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Situations but us near our triggers...its so hard...just having money is bad for me
Sorry you had a slip. Try telling people you don't want to drink, they might understand and if they don't then you don't really want them. Best reason I've ever heard was they were "allergic to alcohol. It makes me break out in handcuffs."
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I know it's a bummer. But you have grown so much. I'm proud of you though because you are learning from your mistakes nor are you in the shoes you were 6 weeks ago.
Now, we have to work on telling people you don't want to drink. Why do you struggle with that?
I have this feeling that my date would find me boring if I don't join her for a drink
Super cool one
Homie, I’ve been there. Plenty of times. But I’ve learned to frame these situations not as an alcohol problem, but a dating challenge. And what it comes down to is confidence in yourself, and compatibility based on your needs.
Confidence: I know I’m cool as fuck when I drink, but why? And how do I do it without alcohol? A bit of it is a lack of shame, and a bit of it is not being concerned with consequences, so long as I don’t do anything destructive to myself or others.
Compatibility: if she doesn’t support you bettering yourself through sobriety then that’s not someone you should make an effort to be with.
When it comes time to order drinks, just don’t mention alcohol. Let her order first (the only part of chivalry that should stay alive). If she orders alcohol then don’t make any sort of deal about it. Then order your drink, also not making it a big deal. If she asks about it, then just say you don’t drink and leave it at that. If she wants to investigate from there then say whatever you’re gonna say with confidence and a positive demeanor. Say it’s for growth, say hangovers suck, say it’s for your health. She’ll probably agree with all that. If she brings up moderation, which has happened to me, I tell her: if I’m not drinking to get drunk, then what’s the point? I’m relaxed enough as it is, I might as well be healthier about it too.
I’ve even said I don’t like the taste of alcohol.
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I’m not a big time ladies man, and the dating experience is a little more challenging while staying sober. But I figured it’s more meaningful when I’m not drinking. And I try to double down on charisma without the “performance enhancer”
Sex has been significantly less clumsy since sobriety too 
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You’re not the first man to go through this, and probably won’t be the last.
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Oh, my man! You are a genius and hit the nail.
I see that this is the biggest thing that dragged me into partying
Hey but look at it this way Ajay. You reduced the harm you caused compared to the last time right? It’s the small victories- not your best but also far from your worst.
Ajay. Nothing to feel ashamed of, we don't need to impress anyone. I've been there and done that like many of us..Michael H has a point. Ok you had a few drinks but it took courage for you to admit..you feel dust yourself off and tomorrow is another day..don't count the days your sober, count the days when you wake up with No Hangover and especially with No Shame..if that partner can't understand then that's there bad..don't please no one but love yourself..
Sorry I meant dust yourself. Sorry
Thanks alot Noel. Two glasses of wine gave me hangover. For sure, not touching drinks anytime soon
Yeah I think this is good advice. I just say I don’t drink. I always use to drink on dates and being sober I thought would be socially challenging for me but it’s not that bad. Just don’t make it a big deal in your head.
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