Sometimes i wish there was somebody to call in those moment that dont know you, where their judgment wouldn’t matter. Idc what they say, telling someone you know will never be comfortable.
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There is a 24hr line in Seattle you can call where you can talk to someone like this, but cares deeply for your health and sobriety. Look up Intergroup Seattle - you can text there too! Praying for you friend!
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Curtis, I hear you man. That’s why I dig the anonymous part of AA/CA/NA. I can go to a new meeting and spill my shittt and no one knows me. To be honest, they got some crazy shittt too and don’t seem to judge, at all.
I’m here if you want to talk or have any questions
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It’s really hard, but don’t give up! You got this!! 
I struggle for real big time every day after work to not go home and cave into my cravings!!
There's a 24 hour line in Los Angeles, California as well. (323) 936-4343 . I've called them to look for meetings but also heard some ppl call just to chat when they're in the thick of it. I've called when my friends would volunteer there at 3am just to chat.
Start adding some friends in here. Get a few numbers from people who’ve been where you are. So someone is always a text away. Check out the audio stories on the app, people sharing their stories. If you have questions, post them. Never give up.