Another day of not having any real life local human friends or people to talk to. I feel like now I don’t even want to do this recovery journey anymore. People think I’m okay but I’m so miserable bc of several thing beyond my immediate control. I try to be grateful and happy. I even hit a meeting today. Life feels like it will never stop being hard and painful. So it would be great to check out. I’m trying not to let that happen. Fighting hard today to see the light.
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Hang in there. 6 months ago I would collapse without having a friend around me 24/7. I’m now ok being alone, but hate being lonely. It’s a process that will hurt immensely and you will never forget. But you are the one person in your life that you have to answer to every day. Solitude will bring strength. It takes times, and know that you are not alone. Ever. There is always someone who was on a similar path. Stay connected and those people who truly matter will begin to appear.
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Keep going to meetings. They are very helpful. Saved my life and really help me understand how to be just ok. One day at a time.
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If you have the time, go to multiple meetings per day. I remember that I would go to as many as 3 a day. It was also suggested to me to go to 90 meetings in 90 days. That was a great suggestion.
Hang in there, it will get better if you stay sober.
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Thank you. I abandoned all my recovery meetings and recovery friends when I got married three years ago. Turned out to be a big mistake getting married bc he’s a pathological liar with a horrible drinking problem he won’t admit to and he kept cheating on me w Internet women so now I have filed for divorce. No husband, no friends, no family unit, no in person support from people anymore. I don’t even have someone I can text jokes or funny stories to during the day. My life literally went into the drain this last year and it was just beyond my control. Daily life is just pure stress now caring for my kids and trying to run a farm. And when I get the kids to bed I just sit alone for awhile and then go to bed. I don’t want to seem miserable or ungrateful it’s just so hard to see this ever getting better for me.
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It’s time you change your story Lauren. The past 3 years are in the rear view mirror. This part of your journey is over. It hasn’t been easy, but you survived and you’re sober!! You get to choose how you want this new chapter to go. I suggest you go back to meetings and reconnect with a support group. You are not the first person who has abandoned their program of recovery for a relationship. You will be accepted back with open arms. Your life may not change much, but your perspective can change a lot. Go for it Lauren!
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I don't know how much sober time you have but that is definitely the disease telling you that this time everything will be okay. But it never is is it? It's called believing the big lie. Don't believe the big lie because I can testify that I've been there and when you wake up the next day you're going to realize what a stupid move it was. You'll have more shame to carry around realizing that you accomplished absolutely nothing.
Life doesn't get easier because we put the cap on the bottle. We just get better at handling life one day at a time. But in order to get better we have to be transformed. The only way we can be transformed is by taking the 12 Steps of AA. That's what they were designed to do. They were written by alcoholics for alcoholics.
If you're not doing anything except not drinking you're probably not going to get very far or feel very good.
There's an old story in AA. ..
What do you get when you get a horse thief sober? A sober horse thief.
Drinking was but a symptom of our problem. We have to get down to causes and conditions in order to be transformed and feel good again.
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Meetings meetings meetings, repetition repetition repetition it all will help you find somebody at a meeting who has what you want, and ask them to be your sponsor you will love it
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You’re stronger than you think. I’m living with someone who will not take responsibility for anything and they constantly have to remind me of how much they are helping me…
I’m so fcuking frustrated I’m ready to leave and go to the hospital so I can be placed into another treatment facility for the next 4-6 months.
I have 25 months sobriety and I’m just tired of being broke and homeless bouncing around from place to place.
I feel like as hard as a MFer! Lonely man, lonely
Feel free to send stories or funny jokes anytime or anything in general. From one Lauren to another 
. I feel ya as I’ve got a lot of issues going on too. Which I drank to avoid a lot of the time. Finding it better sober though even if it’s still not the way I wish it was.
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I feel like this often and have to tell myself, if I drink tonight, tomorrow morning I’m still going to feel as garbage as I do right now, plus I’ll be ashamed and guilty and mad at myself for relapsing. It’s not a cozy, comforting feeling. But it helps me white knuckle through the really rough nights.
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Thank you again for your replies/comments. I made it through the day clean and sober somehow. I am hoping to have another clean/sober day today. I hope you all have an awesome Friday. I’m gonna try to do so and hit a meeting tonight! Thank you for your support!
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Good to hear! Getting reconnected is going to change your world! Give it time…ODAAT
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Sounds like you need a stronger recovery team. This recovery just doesn’t happen it is work everyday. But not doing a meeting not a good idea. There must agency’s around you for more support. Don’t give up it does get better not perfect but better. It’s all depends on you.
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Change is hard. I think the key is to stop rejecting the way things are and accept the situation fully. You may not want things to be the way they are, and yet they remain. Let it be. Sometimes there's no way out of a situation but there is always a way through. And it begins with accepting what is. When you come to peace with yourself you can then more clearly and more naturally make the right changes to your situation. And it won't be out of a desperate need to change the situation you're in. Hope this helps. 
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I feel your pain. Life seems to be going that way for me this year. Just working and hitting meetings like they’re going out of style. Besides that I lay around a lot. My fiancé left me so I’m pretty miserable of that. But I keep praying and I know one day all will be different . I’ll keep coming back.!
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I’m sorry to hear that, I feel your pain. I struggle everyday to find joy. I have 202 days, try to hang in there
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Stay strong. It’s hard but everything is so much better the more time you have. My date is 12-4-2014. And I had been addicted to far too many things. Alcohol I could not kick. Rehab was a one and done for me. Stay with a program wether it’s AA or a substance abuse counselor. Aftercare is the ticket to staying sober. Doesn’t mean you’re not gonna think about it. Just pause and breathe. You got this!
Life IS always going to be hard but we are learning new tools on how to deal with it—sober. Over time, we get better at it and over time we start making better decisions and knowing how to do the “right” things. Hang in there and fake it till ya make it. 