Any Sobriety Threating Issues. Later I'll go see my kids. There with the ex. Would be no issue untill 20 min in when she starts saying, see kids there's your Alcholic fater. I wonder where the beer is. I've grown alot and don't allow that kind mental base work as hard. Still hurtful, but hey I'm a alcoholic. I know I deserve some, but after 6 months lol.
2 Likes
Just take the high road. Don't react. Less is more. People try to get you to react but don't give them anything.
3 Likes
Set the boundaries with her. That is not ok! Any defamation should not and is not ok especially with your kids.
3 Likes
Sound advice 100 percent true. Ill be alright. I was sharing to see if anyone else is on the edge, and just shy or nervous to share. But you right.
Our Lawyers are supposed to be handing that.........But yea.
How are you all today. I've got great weather here in TX.
People, places and things are huge triggers. Do you have a sponsor or buddy with long-term sobriety or life experience that you would trust to be a "backup bro" to accompany you in these visits. You don't have to do this alone, in fact I wouldn't recommend it. Proud of you for sharing...it helps me in my journey!
2 Likes
I have a sooner. I was just putting out that it could be a potential sobriety issue. Yea I work the steps hard. I put my number out on this app yesterday If anyone needed help. I've gotten a few calls and made me feel so good helping them. Helps me in huge way.
That is not an ok thing to say to the kids in front of you. I think you should set bound rules. I understand you can’t help when you aren’t around but in your presence it is rude
I have custody hearing on June 9th.
I hate when people involce the kids. Sorry dude.
I’m sorry to hear it, Jeff. Yes, I just went through an 18 month divorce and I have a 5 year old daughter with my ex. At about the 12 month marker, right after our mediation, I went to rehab and detox. I know my ex says things to my daughter about her alcoholic father but I can’t control that. What I can control is my time with my daughter. I can now stay present with her and I pour myself into every moment I spend with her. I am fortunate that I have 50/50 custody but I’m convinced that my ex stuck with that plan because she is incapable of being a full time single mom and she knows how important it is for my daughter to have me in her life. I got some great advice recently at an open-share meeting. You will always be married to your ex even after divorce if you have kids so 1) always say yes to anything she asks of you that involves your children if you can, and 2) when she treats you inappropriately, ignore her. It’s the demons in her that does it and think of her as sick like you. Eventually, it will get better but it will always be there. You do not deserve to be treated that way. I thought for a long time that I did as well but we don’t. You need to set boundaries and those can be set by not replying if it happens over text or email. If she says it in front of your kids, try to find a moment when you are alone and politely ask that she work not to as it isn’t helpful for your triggers or for the children’s benefit. Good luck, my friend, and feel free to reach out if you want to chat
1 Like
I really appreciate that. Thank You so much.