Are there any people who are sober and their partners are in an active relapse. I’ve been sober 3 1/2 years . The company you keep is a direct reflection.
we are in two different places. I have sympathy for him but can’t live with a person who has zero respect for me. It feels impossible to make a decision stay or go. i see 2 people in him the sober one and the train wreck.
My mom was in active addiction and I did what I could but had to walk way because it was hurting my sobriety
I have (we) got to do what is best for us today in this moment
I was newly sober for 2 months. My now ex continued to drink. I was fine until he went almost 2 weeks getting drunk every night. Because I wasn't participating it was too hard to handle. I ended up crushing under the pressure. Yes it can be difficult to maintain gains if who you are with someone whose drinking is problematic.
@danielle320508 You and your sobriety come first. You can't fix the individual. They can't give you something they don't have.
It's time to move on. Again you come first.
Run girl!
Yes, and it hurst every day knowing she would rather have that bottle than my love. I'm about to walk away.
There is someone out there that will appreciate you/me is what I keep telling myself. It’s also peaceful being alone.
1st we save ourselves, we live by example and then we have a chance to help others.
I had to separate myself and protect my sobriety.
We have to love ourselves or we parish… that’s just how it is
I personally just went through this. I ended up staying and relapsing. SURROUND YOURSELF with sober people. Please please please feel free to message me anytime. You are in control and your higher power is guiding you. Lean into him and the program. Now is the time to replace the together time you guys share with program and sober people. YOU ARE STRONGER THAN THIS! You have to put your oxygen mask on first. It’s hard to put yourself first, I know, but we are worthless when we go back to our old coping mechanisms. It’s not the same when you go back out, trust me.
If you have to if you can’t get through to him leave him alone. You have to put yourself first and make sure you live the life you want with or without him
I see why a lot of people start drinking again when their partner is drinking everyday, i told him if I start drinking again then this behavior would be fine, there would be no more fighting. But I don’t get that option,I’m the one who has everything to lose he has nothing. It’s not worth it, that’s not the life I’m trying to live I’ve worked really hard to get where I am!
Just because you changed doesn't mean your other half will. You can change a person . They have to change. I know that's not what you might not want to hear.
That’s a tough one, for sure. I guess what it would boil down to is your peace. If your piece is constantly in jeopardy that could slowly chip away at your sobriety. We know that we can’t make somebody get sober, but you could definitely lay some clear boundaries and ultimatums. At the end of the day, you have to make sure that you are OK. Always here to talk, send me a DM anytime. Rooting for you.
Thank you, I definitely have not had peace. He has made it easy for me, he went to work one morning and hasn’t been back since. His drinking has won.
Praying for you!, and him, hopefully he makes it back into the rooms/program
You already know what to do to protect and save yourself... You can do it.
That is hard to navigate
I am in the same position and it’s heartbreaking and infuriating at the same time. Things are really coming to a head - boundaries are being set to keep my peace and sobriety in tact. Here for you. Be strong.