As addict we always talk of how we’ll get our shit right and be straight like it’s a life switch that we can just switch off. I was once responsible never had a drop of alcohol or anything. I was the most promising athlete in school. I always had leadership roles in school from primary school all the way to secondary school. I was looking at what teachers said about me. Even recommendations for college they wrote a totally different person than I am now. I can barely get out of bed. I can barely focus on anything. I dropped out of law school in 3rd year(think they call it junior over here) just because I thought it wasn’t for me. I have always been passionate about law. Now I am 28 and thinking of nursing school I mean wtf. My literature teacher once told me he always looked forward to my writing because it was authentic it was me. Now I can barely write a sentence without looking up spellings and shit. I am the first born of 4. My siblings are 25, 13 and 10 respectively. I came to the US 7 years ago my sisters were 7 and 4. They tell me they miss me. When can they see me again but I am too ashamed to show them who I have become. I named them. I helped with their care. I got their ears pierced changed diapers made their hair whenever mom was broke we bonded over sofia the first and telemundo. How do I face them with the demons I am battling every day.
One day at a time
That person is still in there. The leader, the writer, the promising, responsible person is still there. Now you have experiences that can bring you wisdom if you allow them to. Meditation was it for me this time and I’m feeling stronger every day. meetings, IPO, god, find what that is for you and as Robin’s said, one day at a time you will get closer to your truest self. Don’t give up. It’s never too late.
Fire book
Thank you kindly
Lol I missed the reference 
Thank you 
Lmao I read a lot and you making me feel all creative and shit:joy:
Listen I am 46 with a family and heading to detox soon and I’m trying to get sober and get my shit together. Just don’t wait as I have. You sound amazing and I think there is a bit of faith when trying to get sober that it will be better. My family does not know my demons either. I am praying that they will provide support once they find out. Regardless We can get support elsewhere with people who get what addiction does. Don’t give up. Nothing happens overnight. Believe in yourself.
Well Eileen!!!! Reading your story sounds like you had a pretty decent childhood. Even your teachers we’re very impressed with you. But you know shit happens. And it happens to the best of us as well. Did you say you’re 28 years old I’m thinking about going to nursing school. If you’re thinking about it you should do it. We all make mistakes. Trust me I know about the mistakes. Do you have it in you as Brandy says that person still in there. Do you have it in you so use it. Don’t be afraid of it. Can you say about your siblings go Face them and explain it to them what happen. Don’t be afraid of your siblings. Have faith in yourself if you don’t have faith in yourself I have faith in you. You’re such a strong woman and you’re ready for this.
Thank you so much for this but they’re kids how do I begin
I pray for you as well. My brother was so supportive. He’s the 25 year old
Might I mention I am from a single parent and sometimes I believe I was good just not embarrass my mom
I was a single parent and my oldest is 26. He’s an amazing person and older sibling like you. My youngest is 9. Just know there is better for us