As Bill Sees It Pg. 90

Recovery
#1

To Watch Loneliness Vanish

Almost without exception, alcoholics are tortured by loneliness. Even before our drinking got bad and people began to cut us off, nearly all of us suffered the feeling that we didn’t quite belong. Either we were shy, and dared not draw near others, or we were noisy good fellows constantly craving attention and companionship, but rarely getting it. There was always that mysterious barrier we could neither surmount nor understand. That’s one reason we loved alcohol too well. But even Bacchus betrayed us; we were finally struck down and left in terrified isolation.

Life takes on new meaning in A.A. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends—this is an experience not to be missed. 1. TWELVE AND TWELVE, P. 57 2. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, P. 89

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#2

Thanks for sharing. I wouldn’t say loneliness disappeared, but it had certainly subsided. For me, loneliness comes and goes. The difference today is that I recognize it, and have tools (a program of recovery) to manage it. My connection to the fellowship has helped me tremendously.

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#3

Yeah I am lonely as f right now as we speak? :joy:

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#4

I think a lot of people take a lot of things in "the book" literally. Like urges will "vanish" and all that blah blah blah about praying for things to be "lifted".

I find this to be hugely problematic mainly because A: They are nonsense. Nothing is gonna magically change. And B: Humans all want magical changes. We all wanna take a pill and lose weight or got taller, stronger, harder, softer etc etc without putting in any work.

The ONLY way change will happen, regarding loneliness is to get out there and shake some hands. Be emotionally available. Bring something to the table in all your relationships. Don't be a complaining drag that nobody wants to be around. Be the kind of friend you wanna be. Stop letting the past cast shadows on the present. See someone that looks interesting? Go talk to them. We don't have to be lonely. Appreciate your alone time (seriously, nobody likes a clinger) but you dont have to be lonely. It's YOUR life. Be interesting. Be honest. Be available, emotionally. Don't be a creep.

Live long and prosper.

This is As Taylor Sees It.

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#5

Same here. If I had to go through zoom I wouldn't have made it here. Talking to people in real life has made all the difference for me.

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#6

I still remember the first time I was alone and didn't feel either terrible loneliness or impending doom. I was sitting on a bench in a forest by a stream. I was sitting there just thinking about my life. Suddenly I was hit with a sense of wonder and confusion. I realized something was strange. I didn't understand what. Then quietly God as I understand God said you're still, your calm, and you're quiet. You're alone and not worrying about what you did or said recently or from your past. I also wasn't wishing I had some perfect person with me "saving and carrying me"
I am so humbly grateful for that first time and the thousands of times since.
I didn't go to AA for solitude but was given it there.

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#7

That is truly, truly truly amazing I am really going to take that to heart!! Thanks for putting that out there, it is vital and beautiful!

#8

Thank you. I just joined and didn't know I was going to jump in and write so much.

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#9

I sent you a friend request