Being able to be grateful is something that has always been hard for me in all aspects of my life. Meaning in and out pf my recovery. I found that i can say to
Mysef im grateful for this and grateful for that but internally and with the long history of my guilt and shame its been a struggle. Finding myself and trying to become the best version of myself has been a serious goal for me. Because through out the years i know ive lost that person due to chemicals changing me mentally. Patience will bring for that goal but patience is one thing i dont have but have learned to appreciate. Instant gratification in all aspects of myife only brings temporary relief. My thought process and my impulsiveness also continues to bring chaos and backsliding. Today i really try to enjoy the small progress i make and wven if its just me waking up clean, i tell myself im grateful.
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