I am a secondary caretaker for my elderly father and this is my weekend to stay with him. My parents’ house is full of alcohol. It’s in every room, wine refrigerators, etc. Wine was my drink of choice. I dread my weekends caring for my father. I am on edge the whole time, unable to relax.
I don’t quite know how to approach the subject with my stepmom. She lacks basic empathy so I’m not expecting much from her.
Any tips and support from the sober community is appreciated.
Being sober requires a lot more honesty than we dealt with in the past. Whether she has empathy or not is her problem not yours. Tell her booze has got to be locked up or removed or you can’t help. If you are thinking about that booze, for sure your addiction is thinking about it.
Sobriety is so much about boundaries.
First of all, let me just say what you’re doing is incredibly brave and selfless. I was one of the primary caregivers for my mom last year after her stroke, and it was the hardest thing I have ever done. I’m currently employed at a brewery, and not even a month sober, and it’s definitely taken a lot of positive self talk to figure out how to adjust. Considering you said you’re not expecting much from your stepmom, I’m wondering if you might have a better outcome talking to your dad directly? I’m sure he appreciates you helping to care for him, and it wouldn’t take much for your stepmom to just grab a box and put the bottles out of sight while you’re there. I feel like that is a very reasonable request, especially since caring for an elderly parent is no easy feat. I hope this helps!
There wine is not the problem it is there house.it is your problem.good job on one month.you need to get help and go to meetings.talk to women and get lots of friends.aa.org 90 meetings in 90 days. Zoom meetings .there are no boundaries.only at your house.we have to be spiritually fit.do go around drinkers.if not I don’t go.go to meetings before you go around drinkers.much safer.