I had to clopen (close then open the store) the past two days IN A ROW. I am so tired. While I was at work a thought of hmmm if i could use rn my body wouldn’t hurt so much. I quickly caught myself and told myself but it rlly wouldn’t help. You will get immediately sick and your body WONT be feeling any better. It’s wild how our brains can trick us and glamorize addiction. I have to remind myself often of how bad it gets and I don’t want to start that loop/ cycle over. Does anyone else have these intrusive thoughts??
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Unfortunately that’s how it is for us addicts !!!! We used when we were happy, sad, mad .. we used any excuse to use !! I’m happy you caught yourself
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Recovery starts with awareness. It’s ok to feel those feelings. It’s what we do next that counts. That awareness and pause it where our new found power of choice steps in to help us think it thru. You did it! Keep doing it ODAAT
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That's the ground breaking stuff I was talking about, dang Two look at u GROW, That's my dawg!!!! lol
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I agree with SoberinSoFlo. It's not as pronounced as before but easily dismissed knowing where it will take me. Keep doing what you are doing.
It never worked before it will never work.
Keep at it. Good job 
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Remember the PAIN, TWO. Remember the PAIN.
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The intrusive thought lessen over time but never go away. But the desire to act on those intrusive thought does go away if you give your recovery time to get there. Hope that helps
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I still get them five years later, fortunately I had a guy tell me once that I don’t need to think of the good times using, I need to think of the bad times using and then I remember that the good times were gone and I couldn’t remember the last time I had a good time using. So that helps me, but I also realize that it won’t end well and I’ll be consumed with guilt, shame and despair and I don’t want of that in my life anymore. I know it will come in some fashion, living on life’s terms, but I don’t want to experience it from using.
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AGREED !! 
yours words are sooo true. It gets to a point where there rlly are NO good times it’s all just bad times and using to just feel “normal”.
yes definitely 
It’s so weird how our brains try to bury the pain. I’ve been told it’s a coping mechanism. Your brain will try to black out because it’s so much trauma that you experience it doesn’t wanna hurt itself if that makes sense lol
FRRR i always forget this!!! Your totally right yes it is the power having the ability to pause. It is what you do next that counts !! I agree with you
THANKS DAWGG 
we will keep on pushing and growing. Sober gang 
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Absolutely
I'm not sure why the addict brain does what it does. I just try to remember to "play the whole tape all the way thru to the end." When I do I'm never laughing and smiling. I'm always broke and depressed.
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Ermahgerd if we are thinking of the same thing with the "blues" I know exactly what you mean. Needed those little shites to do anything remotely taxing or strenuous. I know it was made so much by the addiction psychosomatically making you feel more "tired" and "sore" than you really were, hence justifying popping a blue while you are trying to quit. In my case, followed by having to take 4 more to come down from the inevitable blow bought after the blue dam breaks. 🤦 So glad I'm not doing that anymore. Sorry if I'm projecting, but your situation just sounded reallllllly familiar lol
Thanks for sharing
Keep on keepin on Two
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I know I will always have these kind of feelings and thoughts going forward. I know focus on my actions more. Feelings are normal it's how we act on them that decides what we do next.
yess blues are a demon. They take over your whole mind and body. I have to be on medication for the cravings and it blocks opiates too so that helps me a lot stay away from those little shites
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Clopen...sometimes my mind is "Clopen"! 
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Stinkin thinkin? Enough people do it became that
bumpkin saying!
Sure. Whenever
I watch Yellowstone I can smell the bourbon and the Coors. Same
when I used
to watch Ray
Donovan I
could feel thenJamison they
clobbered in every
episode.
The truth os
we all go through it from time to time.
Thats why being part of a recovery
group (I use AA & NA)
is important. That
little voice
needs to remind
you that it wasn't always a party, and there was
always a
price paid.