I’ve been sober going on 5 years. I do not feel the urge to drink or use, however I feel like I’m not doing enough. I’m a mother of four daughters who all have their own personalities and challenges. I’m constantly battling their anxiety, ADD, ADHD and one with autism. Along with my own depression and anxiety. Plain and simple I am miserable, agitated yet also numb to any emotion besides anger. I haven’t been to a meeting in so long, I know I should attend but I have zero motivation. Any alone time I get from my four daughters and husband I just want to veg out. I did a journal page today so I call that a step in the runt direction. My Mother brother are constantly telling me that I’m their rock and an amazing mother, I’m doing such a good job. But to me it sounds like they are talking about someone else. I just want to find myself again, be happy and LIVE.
I wish I had some advice for you Amy but 5 years is amazing 
but I do hope you find some answers
I’d would recommend getting back to meetings, help a newcomer. Mostly I hear a person that is burnt out and needs some fun and adventure. Congratulations of your sobriety!!
I recommend getting back to meetings and taking time for yourself. I drifted away from my recovery program, and little by little I began feeling trapped. Daddy needed a break! Well, daddy’s little break turned into a disaster! Im sure it wasn’t easy putting the pieces of your life back together. You don’t want to break it all apart. Go get yourself some help before it’s too late. It’s pretty awesome you recognize this and have started to make your way back! Keep going
Thanks so much!