I will not accept nor engage with people who confuse me with themselves or other people who are or were or will be in their lives.
People do this to me all of the time. I don't know why. I have a neutral nature. I am honest and self-assured, which has been in my nature since birth and has gone through some unsteady times, but is a solid foundation.
My maturity is great and perhaps this is why they do it. Maybe I am some sort of mother or father figure for them.
The type of parent that is willing to silently and / or conversationally engage with their child's self projections and self examinations. They view me as their mirror or sound board, some of which without knowing or willing to admit they do. Whereas others do it with intention but think it is acceptable because they think it is my role to allow it.
My compassionate nature says they need to come into their own, ie establish their own identity and love that identity enough to want to stop projecting it onto others, especially those they feel should , will, or don't have a choice.
My defensive nature says they are doing it to harm me because they frustrated, angry, in denial, or lazy.
When my compassionate nature and my defensive nature meet in the middle, I get back to center. My center gives me a reality check. The reality is these are not my children. They are adults. The reasons behind why they do, why they dont do, how they think,how they don't think, how they feel, how they dont feel, how they act, how they dont act, their intentions, it doesn't make a difference.
Respecting boundaries and upholding agreements is standard. Knowing the difference between you, me, or someone / something else is standard.
These people will drop like flies one by one starting with those that are not needed for my survival. Those that stand in the way of or disrupt my ability to thrive will be maneuvered.
Compartmentalize to see life clearly. See me as an individual. My action or inaction will show you. Direct experience with me will show you. How you feel around me will show you. And finally, what is the actual role we have agreed on to be in eachothers lives?
Another form of self projection: If I say something or someone is like me it's not a compliment, it's the least offensive way for me to say I am trying to relate to you out of fear you wont relate to me, there is too much that I don't relate with in you, or I dont like you or relate to you and I am searching for a way to like you, because I love myself especially in scenarios where it is a requirement to interact with you, such as work.
I know what I like and dont like about others, but if i have to search for what I like about you I won't keep projecting until I finally do. I will not waste my time. I trust myself.