Cooking for only two and how do I adjust?! My son and I moved away and I got out of the life and got clean and sober 15 months ago when my husband died. We just got our own place after living with my parents since then and I don’t know how to do this real life thing. I’m 44 and I haven’t been on my own since I was 15 and not cooking for the whole family plus whatever tweakers were crashing on my couch is weird. I don’t know how to cook for my son and I and not a house full of people and it’s really tripping me out a little bit. Like when we were living with my parents my brother and sister live there still so I was cooking for all six of us which was what I was used to but now that we have our own place it’s just me and my son and I find it weird. I don’t feel like cooking just some little tiny thing for the two of us and I know it’s unhealthy to just eat like easy microwave junk but I am having trouble adjusting to real life on my own again well basically for the first time since my husband and I got our apartment the week after we graduated high school so I’ve actually never lived on my own. and I think he is having trouble as well adjusting to it being just our family now only our family is in our family anymore because it’s just us 2. The banality of it all is starting to sink in. We’re not living in crisis mode anymore, we’re not living in limbo, we actually have our own place now and we just are in a weird place lately any suggestions would be super helpful and appreciated
Hello Keri. Congratulations on your forward momentum. I totally understand the cooking thing. I was one time single father of two girls and my parents and cooking for all of us. Now my children are grown, they live in different states, and I have to try and live and eat healthy myself now all by myself. What I do is plan out my menu a little ahead of time. I don't go crazy but I do plan. So I'll cook for like two or three people even though it's only just me and I'll eat that meal and then I'll save the rest and eat it the next day. If you don't mind leftovers it actually does work to a degree. I mean who wants who wants to just put one Burger on the grill and leave it at that? So I'll put two or three on and pretend I'm cooking for more. The key is not to waste it. Like tonight I'm having pork chops, asparagus and some rice. I make just enough asparagus for 1 enough rice for 2 and two pork chops. One for tonight and the other one I'll eat tomorrow or the next day. I know it sucks especially if you like to cook for a family, but it seems to work for me.
I agree with Mark, leftovers are awesome. If you are having a day, it’s quick, and you don’t need to figure something out that day. When I was on my own I spent every Sunday cooking for the week so I don’t have to do it when I got home from work. Just pop something in the oven to heat it up. As far as adjusting to your own place, look at it as a win. It is a forward movement. Talk to you sponsor if you have one. Invite people over. It will all work it’s self out.
Thank you! That’s a great idea actually! Then he would have late night leftover snacks when he’s up playing VRchat till 2 AM lol I will try that! Less adjusting to the shopping list/routine that way too! Too many changes at once are overwhelming me sone days.
Thanks! I might try that too. I had a friend who spent a whole weekend cooking the months meals and froze them for that reason and I always said I wanted to do that but was too busy hustling and running around like an idiot with my addict “freinds” to be home long enough to plan ahead to that scale. Maybe that would help fill some of the down time as well. Thanks for the suggestion and encouragement 
Full disclosure Keri, suppertime is probably one of the saddest times of the day for me. I know I have to eat healthy and the temptation to do fast food he's always there but I don't. And on the bright side for you, you have your boy to eat with. When my girls were still home dinner time was an event. None of this eat and run business. We would sit down and share.
We used to be that way and truth be told if he’s asleep or something I just eat a bowl of cereal or microwave a burrito whatever lol normally we do a sit down family thing. It’s just been very hard with his dad gone and the whole “family thing” isn’t the same with an empty chair and that’s been kinda hard to get used to. Living at granny’s it didn’t hit home just like a long sleepover. But now we have a new home and it isn’t the same without dad.
I can't really say that I understand the burden that you carry. A son loses his father a wife or husband. I lost my Mom 2 years ago and that left an empty place. All I can say is that I can be a voice if you need to hear one. And like I tell to so many other people, be gentle with yourself and be well. As far as cereal for dinner I've done that too.
What at first seems strange becomes instinctual remember wherever you are is the cool place to be the here and now is where we have the opportunity to make the best memories
Thank you. I truly appreciate it, this group and this app have literally saved my sanity more times than I can count. Having people that are responsive who understand and who have great advice has been us huge blessing in my life. I have a big sober circle and a lot of people at my local meeting but sometimes I get tired of the politics and the interpersonal junk and the drama and I just need some fresh perspective. It’s a very nice thing to be able to reach out and grab that any time without having to get into some big thing with everybody in the group. I love my group I truly do but sometimes it’s exhausting and it feels like grade school I don’t know if all groups are like that or if it’s just my Group. And I truly love them and I truly appreciate them in my life but sometimes it gets like I don’t know smothering Maybey lol so thank you for replying and helping me out I truly appreciate it😁
That is true. I need to stop thinking about how sad and empty and different it is now and start making new memories and new stuff and embracing the new us and be thankful for what we have been blessed with and that we made it out alive and safe. 
Slow cooker/croc pot meals are great! Plus you always have the leftovers for later or put in the freezer!
True, I love my instapot and it’s fast and easy. We could microwave stuff if I froze it! I forget about that kind of thing lol
Maybe get a Dutch oven. It’s probably my favorite along with a decent chef knife and cutting board. Google one-pot meals. America’s Test Kitchen has The Complete Cooking for Two cookbook. I’ve used it a few times. Seriously, a Dutch oven is so handy. Lodge makes a decent one that is not in the $200 range.
I can relate to this, really. 26 days ago I blew up an already toxic relationship (mutually toxic) and even though there were lots of "downs" it's been hard for me to not miss the "ups". I usually did all the grocery shopping and cooking (she didn't like to do either) and now shopping for just my self is really difficult for me, so I have been doing a lot of eating out. Luckily there are a lot of healthy places around, so that helps.
Oh yeah, the Dutch oven is amazing!
Plus that's one less meal you have to plan, one thing you can cross off your list.
As a chef I can tell you it isnt easy. I went from cooking for hundreds to just cooking for me and the wife. You'll eat a lot of leftovers.