Coping with handling a loss of a close friend

Been sober off and on for years.. recently one of my close friends died and it was someone I always was trying to help out in some way because I saw the greatness in him. He came to God and turned his life around, and then got married. I was so proud of the guy he had become, but then a divorce happened and I let him come live with me for awhile. After a few months he left and went back to his hometown. They just found him dead this week and I'm struggling at him not being around but also because I feel I could've done more...Also because I didn't handle it well, I went and drank and cried hysterically. I was a month sober again and let it take over. So now im freshly only a big whopping 3 days sober and im wondering what's the best coping mechanism for a loss like this. Also since I really want to be sober I don't have a big support group in the community so I do feel lonely at times. I just recently joined this group called the Phoenix(sober community) here in Austin TX, that does activities and cool things with sober people!

I workout, I work outdoors and like nature, so I get my sun to help me, been going to church, been hitting meetings and recently trying harder to dive into the steps, truthfully I just feel like I'm so bored sometimes and my mind races...

Any helpful suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

Love you guys and this community, the goal is to be sober another day! Attached is me and my friend on the night of my birthday this year.

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I’m so sorry for your loss. I know it’s sad but try and remember the good times and celebrating his life to keep him living in your memories. You are blessed to have been able to have him in your life for the time you did. In fact today I saw a reminder of a friend who passed away from od’ing and instead of being sad and drinking a bottle and getting a bag I told my hubby a story about her and we laughed and it was nice to be happy and share that with him. I don’t think I could have done it 3 yrs ago when it first happened but as time goes on it gets easier. It’s not something you get over, but you can get through it.
One thing that helps me when I get in my head is reading. I recently joined a sober book club and I read it every time I need to distract myself mentally or get out of a funk. It has really been helping, I implore you to find something that works for you. I wish you best.

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