Is it wrong to be waiting for her to make the first move? I haven't really ever dated sober. I'm finding it difficult with my fear of rejection.
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It’s not wrong, however, in active addiction, most women manipulated men to get by and most of us are given the suggestion not to chase men for that reason (at least at first). Most men, at least the experience I’ve heard from alcoholic men, could only ask women out with alcohol in their system, so facing possible rejection is a part of the growth process.
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I feel the same way. I was sober when I met my wife and we kind of both made moves at the same time. 18 years later I am single again. Separated for six months. I tried online dating sites and everyone turned out to be a scammer. Right now I have very low self esteem and cannot get the courage to try or even know how. My wife was very clear that we would not be getting back together and we can’t divorce far another 6 months, so I will probably use that as an excuse to not even try.
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Ty I appreciate your kind input. I am still a big baby as far as rejection so I will continue to wait.
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I have been without a solid sober relationship for about 7 yrs. I am so scared of rejection and also my self worth is pretty low or maybe it's self esteem. I'm just gonna leave the dating idea out of the cards until I fully feel comfortable going.forward with any type of moves towards a relationship. Although I did buy her chocolates and a rose that are now sitting on my bedroom dresser. Ugh rejection is a fear I need to get over.
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Ty zanna. I'm actually about to head out to a different aa meeting tonight. I'm just gonna think about myself and stop with the whole relationship idea. I just feel I'm too confused to as how to approach her or what I am actually wanting atm.
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A couple months after my wife left I was so depressed and anxious that I couldn’t function, I almost lost my job. I had tremendous fear towards my future and what it means to me to be divorced. A friend told me that fear is a liar and I didn’t have to believe it. So I chose not to believe it anymore and my whole world started to change.
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I appreciate your input and courage to post on this subject. I went off the rails after sheet and took the kids. Haven't been the same since.
The depression is debilitating somedays but it has been getting better.
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I can’t even imagine what that would be like. Man, it is great that are staying sober with all of that going on. Stay strong, I have been learning to do the best I can and things will work themselves out when the time is right. I know how hard that is to do.
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Thanks for being kind and hearing me.
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Chris I accepted your request am now leaving to a meeting. You can dm now if u would like. Later.
I feel it's the honorable thing to do ...to wait til actually divorced...work on you! Just divorced here a week b4 xmas...IT HURTS...
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Hey bud, coming from a woman, make the move. Put it out there. Life is too short for regrets.
Rejection is part of life and they say the more you do it the less impact it makes when it happens. You bought the rose and chocolates. Give them to her.
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Ty sonia