Dating while sober…

Dating while sober…Tomorrow I have my first date trying to be sober. We’re going to a beachy restaurant. One I’ve drank at before. I do have slight social anxiety as well and am a little nervous. Does anyone have any tips? Also what if he decides to have a drink?

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Hi Gracie! First, let’s rephrase it in a positive way. Tomorrow you have your first sober date. There is no trying. If you feel you really feel that unsure about not being able to resist, maybe you’re not ready to date yet. Hope that makes sense and I don’t sound like an a$$hole. It’s perfectly normal to be anxious. I bet he will be too. I would know in advance what you are going to drink. Iced tea, water, ginger ale etc. Hopefully he will ask you what you want to drink. Give him your reply and if he asks tell him you prefer not to drink tonight that it doesn’t agree with you. If he’s smart and attentive, he may take your cue and not drink. If he asks you if you mind if has a drink I’d say that’s his choice. Again if he’s smart, he will refrain. However, if he does choose to drink, that should be fine with you. If it’s not, then you may want to think about postponing the date until you are ready. I assume he’s driving to the restaurant and will not be getting trashed. Hope it all goes well. Regardless, no drinking for Gracie…:pray::peace_symbol:

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That is actually very helpful, thank you :innocent::pray:

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Dating while in recovery is tricky. But I found that when I didn't make a big deal about, it always turned out fine. Soberinsoflo is correct in my opinion. When it comes to going out to dinner, I will always pre order in my head what I'm gonna drink, ices tea, coke, or water. Like she said, "Really don't feel like that tonight I'll have unsweetened ices tea. Don't stress and move on the next topic. Never had a date co e back and question this. Just go with the flow

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If you are with in a year you should not be dating.if you are then all is ok. Make sure next time go to a aa meeting be for you go.

And have fun.

Hope all went well last night. Let us know how you handled things. Hoping it was just a little awkward, and you enjoyed a sober evening. :pray::peace_symbol: