It’s been a tough week but I’m so grateful I didn’t drink or use. My husband and I have been at odds, but since our blowout fight, things have been slowly getting better.
He told our roommates that they need to start looking for another place. We plan to replace them with roommates that don’t know us. That way, boundaries are respected, we’ll have more privacy, and we’ll still have the benefit of the extra income. This isn’t exactly my ideal situation - but it’s a compromise I can live with.
We spent yesterday apart, and I felt like he was “punishing” me by avoiding me and giving me the silent treatment while he was out celebrating with his brother. I felt lonely and left out. I expected him to show up home wasted again and angry.
Well that’s not what happened or what was happening. I was catastrophizing and taking things personally. Turns out he spent the day relaxing, playing cards with his cousin at the casino. It’s a game he’s been playing on his phone all week.
His brother never even met up with him. He showed up at home sober, in a good mood, with fast food for us.
I need to start employing my CBT skills to avoid feeling bad unnecessarily. I’m learning a lot about this in IOP. I downloaded a CBT journaling app to help me with this. So far, I like it and plan to continue using it.
Today, I’m feeling grateful for Loosid, and all the resources I’m using to help improve my mental well being.
This doesn’t have to be harder than it is. I just have to be open and willing to learn and change and try new things. I’m all in folks.