Drank again last night. I feel horrible. I may have lost my wife
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Sorry to hear that Sean…. What was the trigger?
I can’t explain it. I am trying to find help
I understand that. I don't really have triggers that I can identify or explain.
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Has anyone tried the online programs?
I get that man, definitely. Pretty sure my last slip cost me my marriage too.
It's hard, I'm still struggling with it and my sobriety. I do know that drinking only makes things worse, even if I enjoy the short term numbness.
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There are several online programs. I know there is one on this platform. I don’t much about them, as I go in person. I personally know people who have used SMART Recovery and IGNTD recovery.
Hi Sean, I'm 18 months sober this time around. What I did this time. I believe in a comprehensive strategy.
*I went to IOP. I had a good therapist that helped me with why I drank
*Got educated on alcoholism. Read Alcohol Explained by William Porter. It explains how Alcohol keeps you addicted. The website Sober Powered has a wealth of information on alcoholism. But don't stop there keep learning, books and podcasts.
*Find a program you are comfortable with, AA SMmart Recovery, The Luckiest Club. It doesn't matter which one
*Then not least find God and pray. Go to Church. It really does help.
You gotta want it and do it
Reach out anytime prayers always 
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If you can I would try to apply for residential treatment if you’re serious. It will help you identify triggers and some facilities have family day to do counseling with family members you have hurt. Most insurances cover treatment and your employer cannot fire you for taking care of your health. Addiction is a disease and you are not alone. Please think about getting some serious help. Sometimes you just need to change everything. If you’re willing to do the hard work life will eventually feel worth living. Try to focus on the recovery and the other stuff will eventually fall into a place that makes more sense.
Looking into a intensive outpatient program now
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I have an appointment with a outpatient program Thursday at 3:00pm
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Im sorry that you’re going through this, but I’m so glad for you for seeking help. You should be proud of beginning to take the next step because it is not easy. do your best and trust the process. You can get through this and you are worth this.
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My suggestion is to do residential. The consequences just got worse for me, and I needed structure. When I lost my wife and kids, all that was left was my life. It saved my life and prevented it from becoming a larger dumpster fire than it had already become. I know that may sound harsh, but it is all together true. Best of luck brotherđź‘Ť
You don’t ever have to feel this way again brother🙏
Keep your head up bro. Relapses happen just get back in and work harder.
Don’t think, don’t drink, get to a meeting.
I wish you all the best.
I think from my experience you really want things to be different and you are in the right place to ask for help in getting the your wants and needs met.
Just sent you a friend request. We are all in this together. Please feel free to reach out.
There's always hope. But yes, it can happen. But let's not dwell on things that haven't happened yet. Why did you drink?
Let me give you something that I post all the time for people struggling.
Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are
restless, irritable and discontented
unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks—drinks which they see others taking with impunity. After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the
phenomenon of craving develops,
they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an
entire psychic change
there is very little hope of his or her recovery.”
Can you relate to any of this?
I got this psychic change by going to AA meetings, getting a sponsor who took me through the 12 steps. While I was going through the 12 steps the promises of AA started to come true for me. Here are the promises that can come true for you too.
If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through.
The Twelve Promises
We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.
We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.
We will comprehend the word serenity.
We will know peace.
No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.
That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.
We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.
Self-seeking will slip away.
Our whole attitude and outlook on life will change.
Fear of people and economic insecurity will leave us.
We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.
We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us—sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.