Escape
"I came to the program because I felt unhappy, abandoned, and generally miserable." BRB p. 413
Before ACA, many of us were scared. We knew that if something didn't change in our lives, we were likely to be emotionally or physically abused again, and we knew we couldn't take any more. To escape and to try to feel good, we had tried anything - burying ourselves in books all day, playing hours of video games, or compulsively shopping. We may have also used pornography as a way to numb ourselves. Our relationships were not with safe people. Our bodies were racked with tension that never seemed to go away.
Attending our first ACA meeting signaled the start of gradual change for us. As we come out of denial, we realize that we are capable of being healthy and sane. We find that sometimes this involves making hard choices, but ultimately those choices are worth it.
An important choice we make is to do the Steps with a Sponsor or fellow traveler who can be a witness to our positive change. We find that when we make bold, positive moves, the universe steps up to heal us. We are able to live a new story and feel free.
On this day I trust that I am going in the right direction and that I have all the support I need when I am willing to ask