I've decided to remove myself from my immediate family, siblings, mother etc. Why? Because it does not matter if I'm sober in recovery, or in throws of addiction I am not welcome, invited, included. I'm currently 2 months sober from alcohol. I've had long stints of sobriety in the past, still not accepting, isolation. I moved here 5 years ago to be closer to my mom from a different city, not once have I been involved, invited to a holiday meal, birthday, any get together. For my own mental health and recovery I've decided to just remove myself and live a happy sober life away from them, and keep surrounding myself with sober support. Yes, I'm in therapy and that helps a great deal.
I wonder how many others on this app had too or has dealt with the same situation as me. Instead of allowing resentments set in like I did in the past, I've let them go, I've dealt with them and better off mentally and spiritually because of it. I can finally say after all these years of turmoils and heartache from family members, I've found peace.
Hi Teresa;
Sorry to hear what you're going through, especially during the holidays.
I did some stupid and crazy stuff around my family while drunk. It took more than two months of sobriety for them to accept that I was actually sober and maintaining it.
Keep working on yourself and your program. Don't be too hard on them, give them time.
God bless and happy Thanksgiving.
At my meeting this morning we talked a lot about how we’ve found family in AA! Family is the people who stand by you through thick and thin. They’re the people that call when you’re struggling and are excited and proud when you’re succeeding. Distancing from the family you were born to must be hard, but if it’ll save you from heartbreak then you should! You can always reconnect in the future. For now, try to find family in your recovery!
I completely understand and I’m on the same page. I hope you’re doing OK.
@teresa392434 Dude!!! I can 
% relate. I got sober on Christmas Day in 1988. They couldn't and still can't, for the most part, don't get as to why I sobered up. Even after some of them picked up a few DUI'S or passed on due to liver failure. They still don't get it.
I, too, was not included in the holidays, birthdays and milestones.
You're not the only one who is going through it. There are countless others on this platform that can relate.
This is why we promote unity here because you're not alone in this.
You can do this my friend. Add me if you'd like to talk.
I am going through that also but I came to realize I got to worry about me.
I have also done the same. so I completely understand. I see and appreciate you. if you need to talk, I’m here because I’ve done the exact same thing
Teresa, I had similar experiences. My emotional sobriety has become my number one priority. I’ve created a new family with my sober brothers and sisters.
Just because we were born into a family doesn’t necessarily mean anything. Go create loving relationships with anyone you want💞
Sound's healthy
I'm sorry to hear this, and I'm here for you.
Family stuff like this can really hurt, I'm sure many have. A lot of us know what it feels like to be on the outside looking in, no matter how much work we’re doing. You choosing your mental health and sobriety you're doing exactly what you should be doing. This is your sobriety and you are worth it and it's worth protecting.
We're here for you. Sober support can carry you a long way
Thank you everyone for your comments and encouragement. Yes, as much as it hurts to distance myself from my family, I did it for me, my recovery, my mental health and I'm happier. I surround myself with my sober support family and keep busy with them. Yesterday I had a lovely Thanksgiving dinner with sober friends that I cooked for and we had a blast.
I've did the same thing new city and surrounded myself with Positive people my family treats me the Same way keep going it gets better I did the move 8 months ago and I'm Happy
I removed myself also from my family. The healthier you get the more you look around and think your life is not sad bad when you take a step back❣️
I know what your going through. I live in the same town as two of my children and because of my drinking they have ghosted me. I pray everyday for forgiveness and they reach out to me. They don't understand addiction. This is day four for me. I have been through recovery several times. This time I'm determined to stay sober.
I moved to another state , away from my family , friends so I could get sober , I have many wonderful sober friends . I have been around my family while they drink & I don’t . I travel to see them ( always me , I go a couple times per year , people pleaser, the director ) not once have they come to see me ! In 7 years , they are always invited , I have the accommodations, but the don’t come . I’m staying to feel resentful & guilty ,( cuz I left ) I don’t know how to resolve this . I can’t just expect in a few years when I go back every will be wonderful & they welcome me with open arms. , cuz who am I ?
Hi. This really hit me. I haven’t seen my family my entire sobriety. Which is 5 years 2 months. First because of shutdown, which looking back now, was awesome because I didn’t have to deal with going out and facing that booze. Then my family has had many parties, which I refused to attend because of the alcohol amounts that are there, even a baby shower starts with mimosas. I honestly, loved to be part of the family but only when drinking. I realized they were a big trigger for me. Lots of alcoholic in my family. My family mentality is “why can’t she just come and NOT DRINK” They have no understanding of addiction at all. So when those comments got back to me. I cut ties. I just recently told my sister in law this and I told her that if people can’t respect my sobriety, they can go f themselves. I kinda feel at peace because now I don’t get invited. The one thing that has saved me is my husband is on medication and really don’t drink anymore. My life is kinda lonely, because I have my daughter who I hardly ever see. It’s weird because most people gain family in sobriety, I lost everyone. But if I pick up I will lose the one person that has been by my side though all the things I did. So I just cope. My cravings are not that bad anymore but I also ended up with so many health issues. Mind you I only really drank alcoholic like 247 from 2017 to 2020. Not long thank god. Families need more education and I am actually thinking of doing Alanon meetings to try to understand them more. I pray we all can get to the point where we are accepted for our condition. If not. Oh well. I love staying home now. Best wishes my friend. If you ever want to chat send a message. We all need each other because most times that’s all we have. 
Whatever you feel is needed for your best possible chance to full sobriety is acceptable. Some people may understand and support you, others will not. Thats the nature of our "addiction beast"