Fk it. Craving the ice sober now. Depressed suddenly. Angry as the devil and spinning hard. Drinking again. 
Don't do it man. Call someone you can talk to or call a hotline if your craving that bad. There's always someone to listen and help. You are stronger than this and can beat it. Just stop and breath and remember why you wanted to stop in the first place. Hit me on the dm if you'd like to talk offline too.
Thanks bro. I won't go back but I'm starting over on alcohol. 
That's fine. Sh*t happens man. But we move and don't count our falls but the times we get up..just breath and know there's always someone willing to listen. I've said it so many times before, "I cant count the times I've fallen but I do know how many times I've gotten up." It's an on going battle that we all face every day. Which is why I'm not really one for tracking the days. As long as I'm clean today and can go to bed sober that's all that matters to me. You are gonna be ok just as long as you believe in yourself. That's all that matters. I'll hit you in the dm and let you know the zooms I got to. The people is all that matters to me. The program sometimes puts to much pressure on us feeling that we need x amount of days and thats all that matters. When the only thing in my opinion that matters is today. You got this man and I believe in you.
Thanks. You're the only one on here to say anything today so it means a lot. I'll do anything I can to beat it.
That's because I understand and most people just want to talk about positive things. A lot of people can't handle the negativity that comes with this walk so they just focus on the pretty picture. Put it this way, I'm a chef and I will choose the bad fruit/veggies over a good one anyday for the reason. There's still life in there and when you know how to work with something bad and turn it into something good that's where the real growth begins. I'm 38 and have been using since I was 8. I have been down many roads and to a lot of programs. I tend to stick around those who are hurting and in need of help more because that's where good things start. Now I can say a lot of positive sht but if you don't believe it then it really doesnt matter.. Jay it starts with you believing in yourself and knowing that this is something you really want.. I lost to much and have tried for many years to do it for them or to get certain people back in my life. I failed so maybe times because of it. When I started believing in myself and being true to me that's when the real miracle happened. I'm here for you man and don't be shy about hitting me up or someone else.. I used to think I was alone but know now I am not. Keep getting up and don't beat yourself up for the fall if you stay on the ground though that's when you should be pised because your not fighting anymore and allowing defeat be your excuse. You can do this I believe you can because if you didn't then you wouldn't be reaching out for help..
I love that! I'm surrounded by death especially today. I feel bad but I drank so I don't go back to the crystal. I'm sure my end would be soon. A friend suggested a song, Chris dolmeth by hopsin. Exactly why I'm clean and starting this way. Listen to it. It is every meth story I've ever heard. The never ending twister of evil bullish.
Definitely will man. Thanks.
I owe you man you convinced me to keep trying na. I need it and I'm at my weakest. Just do me a favor, try to understand someone you don't. They can't see through the tattoos and shell that covers the mess. Many of them are just like me. I wish I could help us all!
Falling back isn’t always the worst thing in the world. It’s okay to mess up. You learn that way. As long as you don’t stay down forever, it’s all a part of the process. That devil will live on your shoulder for the rest of your life. Some days, he’s bigger than others. Some days, it’s dang near impossible to tell him to f off. Today he won a part of you, but not all of you. That’s something to be proud of. It’s all about progress not perfection. Tomorrow is a new day & maybe it’ll be a better one. Keep your head up man, your not alone. 
I used crystal for less than 5 months & I completely lost my mind. Getting clean and sober without inpatient rehab was THE battle of my life.
The first month I felt like the devil was on my back 24/7.. I thought those intense cravings for a drug that was literally poisoning me, would never go away, but slowly but surely over time they subsided. The same goes for alcohol. Just don’t replace one addiction with another (if you binge eat processed foods with loads of added sugar, you’ll feel almost as shitty as before when you were still drinking). Stay hydrated and carry a reusable water bottle with you 24/7, I reach for my lemon water during cravings and wait for them to pass.
You CAN do this. I believe in you and I’m here whenever! Please do not give in, give it away to your higher power.
We do recover, my friend!
Thank you Amanda that means a ton. Not a lot of people help the stray dog.
And you as well Jess. Was on a year. Coke didn't do in 10 years what that did in less than 1. Crazy sht!!
Thank you! I'm good if I can control my emotions and stay out the cage. Back to drinking but no drugs. I appreciate it chick homie!