Why is a it so hard to meet sober friends? I have been so lonely and didn’t even realize it. I got caught on in the trap of, “they seem to be able to drink and have fun and carry on the next day(s) just fine.”
I tried it and crashed my bike twice on the way home. I woke up with a golf ball size lump on my elbow among other bruises. I have men pursuing me, they all drink… I have new friends pursuing me, they all drink… my old friends drink… I’m depressed( more now that I have alcohol in there…. UGH! What’s the point?!
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Hey Meegan, I'm sorry you're feeling that way. I'm new to sobriety and I can relate on some levels. I can't really hang out with people I used to. Are you actively looking to meet sober people or are you just hoping that people you meet aren't going to drink?
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I’m looking to meet sober people. I don’t do great in large groups, or small talk… I want to “know” sober people, not only just have activities with them.
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Maybe there could be a mock dating situation, meet and greet for potential new besties sort of thing.
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That's very insightful. Being new to sobriety, that perspective actually helps me a lot. Wanting to "know" sober people, not only having activities with them, to distract from drinking, isn't something I had even really thought about, at this point. Thank you for sharing that
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I know it's hard. Drinking is so normalized, it can feel impossible to get away from. 
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I have made a few really good friends in AA. We go to movies, the Drive In, dinner at least once a week. We are all going camping next month too
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If your ok with having a friend in NYC, I’m available! I friend requested you.
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Go to some AA meetings. Share there what your sharing here. Watch and see what happens.
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Hi Meegan my name is Rod. I’m also looking to meet sober friends. Let’s be friends? I’ll talk with you anytime!!
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Hey Meegan,
Your message has connected with me. I’m 16 months sober, divorced and too, at times lonely. However, when I began my sobriety journey I put my life into Gods hands. I believe God will provide when the time is right. Maybe God feels I’m not quite ready and need more time to develop myself and the best possible version I can be. If you find yourself questioning your sobriety viewing how your friends or possible dates and their ability to drink socially, maybe your not ready. I believe my time will come, and so will yours! In the meantime continue to work on being the best “you” and the right person will come. God bless!
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Tf?
Hey Meegan
I know what you mean. I know very few people who don’t drink. Also find myself comparing my drinking habits to theirs and sometimes trying to convince myself that I could have as much control as they do. Never works out that way. H ell I can’t compare my own drinking habits today to my own years ago. I’m also looking for positive things to do. Hoping they help connect me with some people that have a positive influence in my life and vice versa. Joined a gym, looking into a church and some volunteer work. Just some ideas. Maybe you have some of your own
I go to a lot of meetings. I listen for friends sometimes. I fellowship afterwards. We also do stuff like go to movies, museums, parks, etc, without having a meeting around it. There’s the “Meetups “ app which is free. Practice patience and perseverance. Your friends are out there waiting to be discovered.
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This is what has always torpedoed my attempt at sobriety. I’ve been working at it for a full year now, attending meetings and engaging in online communities, but sobriety seems to always require giving a firm “no” to nearly any form of actual, IRL socializing. Dates, MeetUps, networking events…they all happen in bars. Even my beach volleyball league meets up at a bar after games. I haven’t made a single sober friend. I’ve tried AA, Smart, Refuge Recovery. But none of its really social, you know? Meeting ends, everyone goes home. Would love some advice on how to find sober group who actually…hang out.
Are you pursuing places that sober people are?? Deep thoughts by Brian😂
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I hear you. I do. I am not in AA, as you might be? But I am having issues keeping clean and sober friends too. I am local tho! In Denver. Hugs.
I’m ROTFL
So I’d start by joking more recovery groups maybe even on FB, if u have it that is. Meetings I’d actually start there first, u don’t have to do AA or NA if that’s not ur forte. If u wanna personally message me I’d love to help u. 🩷
Over first few months that feeling changes and fades. Trust me. The stupid "time takes time" saying is very true
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