From my book
“ADDICTION IS A DYS-EASE”
We set ourselves up for frustration and disappointment when we have unrealistic expectations based on what we hope or wish for not what reality is
When addicts get frustrated they don’t know how to self soothe as they didn’t learn to do that in a healthy way from the caregivers as a child based on facts and understanding them and desire instant gratification and when they don’t get it they numb the emotional pain caused by that.
Healthy coping skills and tolerance of frustration comes from realistic expectations in the here and now and grounding ourselves by self soothing instead of numbness by accepting that not everything we want the way we want when we want is possible at all times. That’s just being realistic instead of throwing an emotional tantrum and then self medicating with compulsive behaviors.