Good morning Loosid family

Struggling Help
#1

UPDATE. My daughter is coming to see me tonight and I am so hoping this is a good start. Again. Thank you all for your prayers and well wishes. I love this community. The support is amazing. Hugs to you all. :heart::heart:

I don’t normally do this but I need prayers lots of prayers. I have spine surgery on Tuesday and my mental state is not good and I am so scared. My daughter is again being really distant and I never thought that two people that were close could turn out this way.

The wreckage of my past just won’t be forgiven. I just keep apologizing and trying to do the right thing. I even wanted to meet with her husband but he said he has nothing to say and he is too busy to see me so nothing will get fixed before surgery. I just never expected this from my ONLY daughter and my heart hurts so bad and not a good way to proceed with surgery. I am going to see my family priest tomorrow and get a special blessing (that in itself was a big move for me because I have been so angry with god for taking my mom and I didn’t get to say goodbye) but I have an overwhelming scary feeling.

Not being in my drinking addiction is great but my mental state is really bad. Sorry for venting but I have been talking to all my friends but now I need more input.

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#2

Prayers for a successful surgery and speedy recovery.

I don’t know your full story obviously but in my case, I have had to accept the things I cannot control. I make the amends but from there it’s up to the other person. I always have to remind myself that my words will only take me so far. From there, consistent actions and good decisions are all I can do.

Manipulating people so that they will respond how I want them to isn’t part of my program.

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#3

I have apologized profusely and I am trying not to reach out to her (per counselor) but now Tuesday is coming fast and all I want to do is cry. Dam I hate hate alcoholism

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#4

Alcoholism is horrible. I’m praying for you right now. I’ve been doing a lot of crying too and a line from your post that made me cry again is “the wreckage of my past”… man do I feel you there!! :sob: You are NOT alone. I’m giving you a big hug from afar. I know it must’ve been so hard to think about letting God back into your life when you’ve been so angry but I promise you will be happy you are-even if it’s gradual. You have my prayers and good vibes!!

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#5

Thank you. I literally feel like my heart is broken. :broken_heart::broken_heart::broken_heart:

#6

Hang in there. You got this. Try to focus on yourself, meditation, yoga, calming music, prayer, whatever helps to calm you. Sending positive energy.

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#7

:pray:t3::pray:t3::pray:t3:

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#8

In my prayers :pray::kissing_heart:

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#9

Sending positive vibes. Stay strong and have faith. Mending broken bridges can be extremely taxing. Just keep doing the best you can.

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#10

So sorry you are feeling this way. There’s very little you can do at this time. You have made your amends and changed your ways. This is all you really have control over. The feelings of powerlessness over the situation bring up all of these feelings of hurt, and regret. At some point you’re going to have throw your hands up in the air and just let go of it. I do pray that your daughter gets the help she needs to learn how to forgive and move on. I pray that she does this soon, so that y’all can have some peace. As for the surgery, I’m sending you positive vibes for a successful surgery and a speedy recovery. You have a lot going on that is out of your control. Keep saying the serenity prayer and living in the solution my friend :pray::peace_symbol:❤‍🩹

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#11

Thank you my friend. You have heard my struggles since day one. I appreciate you. From last post I thought things would be good.

#12

Progress. You are making progress. Overall, your relationships are moving in the right direction. I know how badly you want to resolve things with your daughter before it’s too late. This must be causing you so much pain. Speak with your priest about this too. Fear is the opposite of faith.

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#13

Part of me wants to go to her house and just end it one way or another but my counselor suggested that I don’t even message her but it’s ripping me apart.

#14

My heart goes out to you my friend, and my prayers go up. :hugs:

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#15

Thank you

#16

We cannot change the past, we can only create the future. Keep reaching out to your daughter. Time may heal the wounds. Only time will tell, though. Reaching out to a clergy person can be a good step. Best wishes and prayers for your complete recovery. We are here if you need us.

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#17

Thank you :heart::pray:

#18

Thank you :pray::pray:

#19

Thank you

#20

I am sorry you have to have such a serious surgery! I will pray for you.

When I am struggling with something in my life, I call my sponsor and talk it over with her. That helps tremendously because she helps me live in the solution. Do you have a sponsor? I also lean into my sober friends in AA, who can relate to me and offer their own experience and how they moved through a given situation. Our will power is so strong. But we only hurt ourselves when we hold onto it with both hands. This must be so overwhelming - but I do wonder, why do you feel you have to have this situation with your daughter rectified before your surgery? What are you afraid of? She may have an ah ha moment herself and surely will be very concerned about you during and after her surgery. Pray on it, give it up to your HP, get to a meeting, and read page 417 in the BB. Praying for you - you will get through this!

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