Not understanding people in recovery always talk about being honest I haven’t been getting it always not understanding why not knowing why if things are based on trust and honesty why am i always left in the dark left on my own to figure things out
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It’s in the Big Book and explained further in the 12&12.
The honesty aspect of the program is for us, the Alcoholic or addict. We have to get honest with ourselves. Then with others. That’s steps 1-5. Ask your sponsor to go over it with you.
Thank you for taking a minute to help 
Rigorous honesty, to me, means to practice honesty in all that we do. Truth and honesty is a two-way street. We can't be honest without others and/or Higher Power. So we really are never alone. We just have to be courageous in relationship with those that share our truth with. Past, present, and future.