Grateful for the massive support of my community yesterday and today. Had my first episode of mania. So that clears up a lot of stuff that was going on for me. I guess i had just never been sober long enough to get there before. Like fully sober off all stimulants. Brain was finally like, here's your dopamine that i just remembered how to cook, have it all. All sorts of pent up tension is releasing. The depressive episode had been so long in the making that I didn't know even know what pleasure was anymore. I feel so alive. Mania stays right... Right? Lol. No I know i need to work this and better believe im staying sober. Im utterly convinced that to drink is to die. Adler's thoughs have helped me so much. Grateful.
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Hang in there! It gets better!
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