Don't really know what to say about this post. But I look back on my photos of when I was using and I know that maybe counter productive at times.  but I am blessed and glad to be here because I know that some people aren't. And I'm not saying that in a narcissistic way like "oh I'm still here." I'm saying that when I did this, I could've died from that issue you know what I'm saying so I'm glad that I'm still here because I know people who are aren't. Every day is a gift and I genuinely cherish all the moments I had with everyone. I still cry because well a lot of the people I knew were very sad people same here I'm still very emotionally unhinged and unstable but I try to get through the days with meditation. And getting to know people and I'll probably jump on the Southmore because I don't really have much to do with my life since I'm looking for a job, but just something for everyone to think about. 
I too am glad. I lost a brother right about the time I decided to get help. It happens in an instant. THANK YOU FOR SHARING. Please, don't ever forget this. The world needs you, it really does.
I’ve always not valued my life still struggle with self love self worth but the inner demons will cave someday
I feel this on a spiritual level
My therapist gave me an assignment to do titled "What is your ideal self? " like it's like a five year plan pretty much like where do you see yourself in five years but you do it just for now so you're going to like write out your personality traits and what do you want for your life? Where do you see yourself stuff like that so I hope that helps. Maybe you could work on something like that if you haven't already, you know any kind of put words on paper and see how it helps.
That's the best idea I can get for you love I don't know what else to say