Life is far from my idea of perfection right now, but this morning I woke up and something came over me about how much my alcoholism affected the lives of the people who love me.
Although most of those people are no longer in my life and none of them ever told me how it affected them, I had a thought about how I would feel if the shoe were on the other foot.
How scary it would be if my child or sibling was driving loaded on booze the way I was once or twice a week putting their lives in danger.
Because of the nature of illness, caring or not caring about how my alcoholism affects other people didn't make a difference until I actually stopped.
AA worked for me. I'm coming up on 4 years.
I don't know if those people will ever come back into my life, but the people who do won't have to worry about me drinking now.
