Having some trouble with explaining my situation to new people in my life. Any advice? I don't want to scare potential friends off.
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Hey what’s your situation , I’m here to listen!
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I've been struggling on and off for years. Almost feels like I shouldn't make friends if I can't be honest but I have a hard time being honest with people outside of places like this.
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Hey if you want to private message me I can totally chat you through this. You can learn to be interdependent on yourself and your love for yourself and your sobriety.
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When i was in a new social situation I didn't yell at the closest tallest building "ATTENTION PLEASE!!! TESTING, TESTING, 1-2-3... ATTENTION PLEASE!!! IM AN ALCOHIC IN RECOVERY!!! THANK YOU AND GO ABOUT YOUR DAY..."
I hope you catch my drift.
When i went out with coworkers, I just didn't drink. It never came up.
With friends that I drank with, didn't drink. I told them I was on some meds that didn't react well with booze. It is the truth, I ignored doctors warnings before. Now the drugs actually work! Imagine that!
With my fraternity brothers guys that saw me professionally drink, I was very upfront and transparent about sobriety and the program I work. Some of them understood some still offered me a blunt (never was my thing, did it twice, another story for another tjme).
People that didn't understand or i felt would put my sobriety in jeopardy had to go away like parachute pants (I hope they never come back). Today I hold my sobriety like a fine porcelain doll that is fragile and could be broken easily if I'm in the wrong place, surrounded by the wrong people or have a compromising plaything.
If they can’t handle your past and your current self then they aren’t meant to be involved in your new life. Being a good friend to you also means respecting your boundaries as you respect theirs.
There are a few principles of the program that help in situations like this...
The program over personalities.
Honesty always...secrets keep you sick.
When in doubt, pause and ask your Higher Power for guidance...the correct answers will come to you.
Talk to your sponsor, ask a trusted friend, pray about it.
Hope some of this can ease your difficulties. Hang in there, it gets better...just keep working your program and going to meetings and let your Higher Power help you.
I would not volunteer any information with anyone until that person has earned your trust over time
You're all heart Jill! Props!