Healing from childhood trauma isn’t linear. I’ve circled through the different emotions many times. Rewiring your brain from what you’ve always known is difficult. I’ve been on this journey for a while, and am experiencing what freedom and safety looks like for the first time. It’s terrifying. It’s also beautiful. I’m resilient and strong. Recovery and healing are absolutely possible.
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I can relate to this 1000%.
The sad part about addiction is the underlying issues that so many people have no idea they’re battling. I know I didn’t. I just assumed these were the cards I was dealt — that this was the life I had to live and I needed to make the best of it.
Until I finally accepted therapy.
Now, I’ve seen therapists and psychologists periodically throughout my life. I’ve even studied some of it in school. But to actually apply it? To admit that I had one of those problems? Maybe it was pride. Maybe I just couldn’t connect the dots.
I don’t know.
But I definitely had severe CPTSD stemming from childhood trauma. And for a long time, I wasn’t even aware of it — because the trauma started so early.
What helped me was finally finding a therapist who taught me psychotherapy and somatic meditation. And she didn’t just teach it, she taught it in a way I could actually understand.
It’s been life-saving.
So thank you for sharing this.
This is something we need to talk more about.
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I agree, it’s something not talked about enough. I had repressed memories that didn’t surface until 7 months ago. Life changed forever. It was also the missing piece I needed to start healing at the core. I’m learning to listen to my body, not fight against it. It’s quite a process.
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Proud of you! Can’t wait to see you where you’re at a year from now. 
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Thank you…and also for sharing about you, I think convos surrounding these hard topics are important - it’s less scary to know you’re not alone.