How do I stay on track I can’t go 24 hours without a drink.
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I can’t let anyone know my problem
Chances are, people already know your problem.
Get to AA meetings. Go to meetings a couple towns over if you'd be more comfortable.
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Well they don’t bc I only have two shots before bed and no one is around me at this time but I don’t want to be this person anymore
Thank you for the advice unfortunately I am in a small community where we don’t have much around us. I do appreciate the advice truly
Taylor is right on the money. Get into A.A.
A good friend of mine practiced the program in the wilds of Alaska. Pre-internet he did it with a sponsor the literature and a phone. If you want to change your life for the better, and it sounds like you do then you can. Hang in there 
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You can attend meeting on zoom all around the world. That was you can truly stay anonymous.
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Thank you I did know that I will be checking into it asap
I'm reposting myself from a few days ago. I tried and failed at withdrawning on my own and failing for over a year. I finally went to the urgent care for help, they were very compassionate and have me straightening up. I was ashamed to even tell medical professionals about my issue but they are discreet.
Just made my first 24 hours without alcohol in over 3 1/2 years. The doctor gave me an Ativan IV at the clinic and then put me on a 5 day routine of Librium to control the withdrawal symptoms and prevent a seizure. They did a blood test and found everything is fine, except my liver is upset. The doctor said it should return to norrmal readings in a month.
I feel fantastic today. My wife woke up and saw my face and eyes weren't red and puffy, she yelled and gave me a big hug. 2 days ago, I literally felt like I was going to die.
I was extremely stubbornly resistant to getting professional help, but it's something I should've done 2-3 years ago.
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Until the pain of remaining the same becomes greater than the fear of change only then can change occur step out of your distorted comfort in that familiar pain and try something else it’s gonna be different and uncomfortable at first but I promise worth it in the end
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Thank you for sharing your story. This is very encouraging