Hey guys, let’s talk about Recovery. I’ve been on this journey since 411 2022 since then I have worked my steps. Keep constant contact with my sponsor. Have my spirituality guidance. I meditate when things are getting rough. I pray the Serenity prayer is amazing and Does wonders and always remember just for today. I made the decision and a choice not to pick up now I know it’s a lot of people on this journey and they tell you that relapse can very well be a part of your journey and that I know to be true because I actually had one year cleaning sober away from drugs and I still went out and relapse because I didn’t have the mindset that I needed to pursue my recovery and the first time something went wrong. My thing was to pick up and use not thinking that that one choice would make me relapse because I didn’t play the tape all the way through. I didn’t think that it could happen to me because I had recovery time. I was working my steps, but I didn’t work all my steps as a result of this school round. I work my steps. I kept a higher power. I made a decision to change, and I knew that I was powerless over methamphetamines and crack cocaine because they were the boss of me. They owned me so when I had to look back and take control of my life, I had to tell crack, cocaine, and methamphetamines that they couldn’t have me anymore I didn’t want to be a part of that dream. I did not wanna die. I definitely didn’t want my kids to say my mom died using drugs. I wanted to get my life together so I will be able to be a part of my children’s life as well as my grandchildren‘s life now I can’t tell you this. It has not been an easy road. I have my family that’s fighting against me because of the choices that I made for four years ago to get away from drugs and they keep seeing the old me. Nobody’s looking evaluating the new me back then I had a voice, but I only use my voice for no good stuff. I never used my voice to help others in Recovery or to help myself in Recovery by screaming out. I have a problem I need some help. Please help me my baby girl look at me one day and she spoke some words that ripped through my soul she said mama God to grandma from you. Why are you taking my mama for me if they don’t make you change if that don’t put something in your head then you are truly messed up and you are a crappy mother because that loan ripped me to shreds I screamed out, called on God and pleaded for his blood come down on me because I needed to met that point in time that was the one sentence that broke me and I hang onto that and People asked me right to this day. Why won’t you use but they don’t see the big master in that room over there next-door to me she may be 23 but she’s forever my baby and I never want her to feel like that again so I get up every single day regardless of what men do to me family do to me anybody does to me and I keep grinding and I keep fighting for Recovery because every day I have to look at that little girl in there and I have to be strong for her because God didn’t take my mama, but I don’t want her to feel like hers is dead even walking around on drugs, so I made the choice and I made the decision the methamphetamines and crack cocaine. Don’t stand a chance so people act all the time why won’t you use? That is why and I stay strong for her because you McLean to need me but I know for a fact that my daughters and my sons meet me my grandchildren meet me and I am not willing to give up on that for anything so if you’re out there and you are in active addiction, get the help it’s people that will help you for free is a lot of the treatment centers take insurance like Medicaid get to help it would be the greatest choice that you’ve ever made in your life and I never telling you I am never telling you that it is a easy battle, but know this is going to be worth it in the end. Get you a sponsor work your steps get into treatment get you your own personal village and everything will go according to plan. I love you guys always here for you if you need to talk if you need help trying to get into treatment or anything of that nature inbox me and I got you even if you just need somebody to listen to you vent I got you stay strong everybody and have a great night#RecoveryWorks 4/11/22
