Hey there. I am new to this app and this life style change of persuing soberity, but wondering if anyone has any advice on how to deal with the embarassment of your actions during previous black outs that people tell you about after the fact that you have no recollection of? I feel disappointed in myself and know my friends and family are disappointed in me as well. Thanks
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Welcome Hannah 
Please realize that what is in the past is done and over. You can learn from it but can't change it.
Use that as motivation to stay clean and sober. Prove others the past is over and does not define who you are today.
Today is a new day and will be a triumphant day we will rejoice!! The past was yesterday, and today, I choose to be sober
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thank you i really appreciate it.
Hello! Give yourself some time to get used to sobriety. Get to some AA meetings. There are many on Zoom. The app, "Meeting Finder" is good. Blue background with white chair. Tell your griefs at one. Makes it easier to apologize to those who deserve it. Look them in the eye when you do. You will feel like 100lbs off your shoulders when you do.
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I suggest going to in person meetings if possible, getting a sponsor and doing the 12 steps. It’s the easiest way to get and stay sober.
You never need to blackout or be embarrassed again. It’s a choice to get and stay sober or not.
I’m here if you want to talk.
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actually went to my first meeting this morning. i dont understand the whole sponser thing though. like what do you or they do?
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Glad you're here!
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The only thing we can do about the past is learn from it. Disappointment is normal, but don't let it eat you. Just apologize where necessary, stand your sober ground in case the blacked out version said somethings you don't agree with, and rock this life!
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Glad your here. First all acknowledge the issue that you don't recall. Apologize for it. And let it go. If you keep dwelling on it you can bring yourself down to the point of a slip. We all did things we are embarrassed or disgusted with ourselves for it. I know I had. But I noticed that the more I was sitting on what I did the more my mental health went down and the harder staying sober was. Luckily I couldn't get no one to give in to me, but I was looking for it. Just keep your head up.
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Hannah a sponsor is someone with time under their belt who can walk you through the 12 steps of AA.
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I pray or I tell myself I can't change the past but I can change my future. I have so much regret but that regret won't help me be happy or stay positive. I instantly try to change my thinking by thinking of something I should do or something I've done right. I get up and clean or do laundry. My main goal is to not dwell in my mind on the things I did, but focus on the things I will do and can get right. We all make mistakes and if people keep talking to you about it kindly shut it down. Just tell them you don't want to live in your mistakes you want to live in the now, this moment and the things you will and are doing better.
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Hi Hannah
Welcome to Loosid. Happy to have you here. Getting a sponsor is a great tool, they are there to help you and be someone you can trust/lean on when you are needing more support. They help you in your worst times and cheer you on in your best.
Going to meetings and finding good support is a great thing to do.
Remember to be patient and kind with yourself. You’ve got this.
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The person you were when intoxicated and blacked out was not you! Your brain was hijacked and you truly didn’t know what you were doing. You are now a new being in sobriety learning, changing and growing and people will notice and will have something new and great to talk to you about .
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Cannot be undone. Can only do better today
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A sponsor is a guide through the 12 steps and helps newcomers navigate early sobriety.
When you choose a sponsor, look for someone with solid sobriety and inner strength, peace and joy.
I’m here if you want to talk.
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Hannah. Just admitting you do these things and not keeping them buried within you is a step of progress in itself. Find you a group, find some accountability....I love you and I am proud of you...forgive yourself. Your here, now, and not there.
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