Hi I’m Lisa, I’m new to all of this. I’m struggling here and now. It’s 2:38 in the morning and I’m wide awake, struggling with my thoughts. Struggling with me. My intentions to not drink are always good don’t want to touch it, that is until 5 o’clock in the evening when I get home from work.
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I log onto aahomegroup.org when I can't sleep. It's a zoom AA meeting that runs 24/7. I struggled with the post-work cravings in the beginning too. I had to get rid of all alcohol in my house, fill the fridge with other cold, fizzy drinks and I kept that 24/7 meeting going on my phone the entire ride home to keep me accountable and help me NOT stop at the gas station. Sending you love and light. You're not alone in this 
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Thank you so much Emily for your response, I will do that. I have those same thoughts while driving home from work too, should I should I not stop at the gas station, etc. What is this love affair that I, so many have with booze? Why I keep asking.
I was an after work and weekend drunk as well. Those thoughts are the addiction doing whatever it can to get what it wants. It’s not a love affair… it’s Stockholm Syndrome in an abusive and destructive relationship.
Meetings help, changing your routine and route home from work helps. Instead of going right home, go to the gym, a park, a meeting, a run… changing up the “normal” will help break that cycle of just swinging in quick to pick up a bottle.
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Hi Tim, yes you are right. I work out at Planet Fitness, it’s very close to work, but instead of going before work I should go after. I need to just do it.
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Maybe try going to an AA meeting after work? Download "The Meeting Guide" App. I've replaced my after work drinking with that and have made a group of friends. It helps a lot because mysery loves company. Worst things worst, an hour at a meeting is an hour not drinking.
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Sounds like what you're really struggling with is the answer to what you're supposed to do with all that free time. That's normal. This is the part of getting sober where you're supposed to be carving out a new life and finding new hobbies. You don't realize how much time we spend wasting away on a barstool until you've got to find something to occupy all that free time. The days can feel a lot longer initially. Because we're no longer passively erasing our minds with booze.
Start looking for things that interest you. New ambitions or reconnect with old ambitions. There's a lot out there to learn. Once you find something positive to erase the drinking, you'll find excitement in that new thing and find yourself thinking less and less about the booze, if which you'll no longer have time for.
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Hi Lisa! Something that helps my after work cravings is having some food I’m excited to make. It’s almost the same routine but healthier and more exciting. Hope that helps some! I will not drink with you today.
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Wow yes that is what I’m most afraid of all the time, what do I do with it, when it’s been spent drinking thinking I’m being productive while drinking my bottle of wine, but it truly is quite the opposite.
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How have you been holding up. I was reading some threads and I see this is an older one. Was just curious on how you were doing. All the advice you were given was great. It’s hard to do but you really need to go to live meetings after work. I struggle with the gym vs meetings all the time. Both are important but meetings should come first. You also need a few phone numbers in your phone. Not close friends. People who can identify with you. People in recovery. So you can call any time your struggling. That is so important. Anyway I hope your doing well!
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Good morning Thomas, thank you for reaching out. I’m not doing great. I’m so tired of my thought life the detox just to retox at night it’s a cyclical nightmare. I’m kinda alone in all of this because I’m afraid to expose myself. But yet I have. Weird I feel like I manipulate all the time especially myself. I am the one who is being manipulated and believing lies.
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We love you Lisa. Many of us have been there and it’s the pits. The courage to be honest open and willing to share deserves the reply that we love you and though it’s hard you are worthy of a life worth living. Keep coming back and your true self will always be grateful for your commitment to yourself. That’s what you’re committing to not just abstainence
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Lisa, my disease, my addiction, my ego wants me dead! But will settle for my misery. For decades I didn’t think it was such a big deal and relapsed countless times. I ruined my businesses, marriage, many friendships and my physical & mental health. After finally doing the program ALL IN and taking this disease seriously, I was released from the self imposed prison of alcoholism.
I wish you the best adventure of sobriety filled w love, light, serenity and service:rocket:
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Hi Danny, I have just read this. Wow this was two years ago and can’t thank you enough for pushing this. I’m not doing well and am ready and need to start this journey of sobriety. I’m miserable and tired of being stuck in this vicious lie that alcohol is the good life the glamorous life. The happy can’t live without lie. I need to rediscover who I am. If you’re still here on this website and read this m. Thank you:)
Hi Tony, I’m just reading this now 2 years later. Thank you so much for your kind words. I am ready to start this journey I am so tired of the detox just to detox in the evening after work and completely blow my weekends. I don’t know how to do this to discover a sober me at those moments. When I get through an evening without booze I realize how happy I am but then I blow it the next night. I’m afraid if Boredom and my mind.