I cant do it anymore. So sick of being sick

Struggling Help
#1

I cant do it anymore. So sick of being sick. Always waiting for something. Im done with this. Cant do it. Waiting for drugs. Waiting to die. Either way im done. Im so sick.

5 Likes
#2

Mike, don't give up, 46 days ago I was right where you are. I was hopeless and desperate. Find an AA or NA meeting in your area and go there today if you can or visit online.
aa meetings.org

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#3

Mike, many times I wanted to quit and many times I isolated and sometimes I did quit. That took years from my life. Then I had to heal the regret and shame. It’s not worth it.

It had to learn how to allow others to help me when I got in my head. Posting here allows others to encourage you to keep going. The weight of the world feels heavy right now and it feels like it’s impossible to trust a process that you’re unfamiliar with. You’re moving into unknown territory and it’s always scary to take the first step, but I promise you if you just keep going, you will make it through this valley.

What are your support systems? Who are you connected to? Who are you picking up the phone and calling? You need to form a support network. Start here on Loosid. Add friends, message them when you’re feeling down. You are a success waiting to happen.

Go to your local meeting today. There are Zoom meetings running 24 hours a day at intherooms.com. There’s a ton of resources to tap into on Loosid. Get into a meeting and share what’s happening, let others help you.
My inbox is always open. You can do this!

3 Likes
#4

Mike, I want to share some really good news with you. This nightmare will pass and you never have to feel like this again!
I felt like you do now, too many times until I surrendered to sobriety. Once I truly surrendered and went to AA/NA/CA meetings early mornings every day, and nights too, I got the relief I was looking for in drugs and alcohol. It was truly amazing.
Mike there is a solution and it’s here waiting for you. Just go and don’t stop going. Even when your addict mind is telling you otherwise.
I’m here if you want to talk

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#5

Please don't give up! We are all here for each other.

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#6

Don't give up I have been there and find a AA or any type of meeting and ask for phone number list and it helps alot I've been having to do that alot lately. Reaching out for help can be hard but it's worth it. You are worth it reach out to anyone on here as well

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#7

I still remember the night I said the same thing. I also, vaguely now as time has passed, remember the night I killed myself. Leading up to that night was anything but roses and sunshine. The darkest time of my life. Ruined my military career, ruined the relationships with people that I never got to mend. (On a side note, Papa Roach Last Resort just started playing in my ear). I felt like I had nothing positive going for me. There was no way out. There was no point on going on with a life in a world filled with peole that couldn't care less. My thoughts after surviving my attempt "whoops, try again next time and keep your mouth shut about it" so I continued drinking, continued drugging and continued to watch my life fall apart. In and out of jail, in and out of homeless shelters. Living on the street. Robbing people houses and cars. Ended up on probation for possession. Then came my 2nd attempt at taking my life. Not many people in my personal life know this story (sorry babe, I know you'll read this later). Found an abandoned house, had a 5th of Turkey and about 20 pills of random prescription drugs stolen over a few weeks. Down they went, eager to die. But I didn't. Something or someone said "not today, you're not done" got called into my probation office and hit with a drug test. 3 days later, my probation officer set me up with a counselor and I walked into my first AA meeting. Long story. I know. And no where near done. That was in 2009. It's now 2025 and I'm still here. Life hasn't been easy for me. There are times where I still think of hanging myself. 5 years ago after my ex wife and I split and I lost everything I almost attempted to. It took one person to make a difference. Find that person. If you can't find the person, find him deep inside you. This isn't the end. It's only the beginning

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#8

But we did it together and we get to spend everyday loving each other and ourselves. I love you more everyday. And that's the thing. One day at a time :sparkling_heart: @mike380851 look for that beacon of light. Whether in yourself or someone holding theirs high. Don't give up. You are here for a reason. It might not be clear now but focus on that. You matter. You've always mattered. And you will continue to matter.

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#9

Hang in there Mike! Go for a walk and then take the time to read everyone’s heart felt messages. Hopefully in that time your thoughts will change :muscle:t2:

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#10

Thanks Matthew for sharing your story. I appreciate it and your words are helpful.

#11

Thanks David.

#12

Thank you Marissa.

#13

Thanks for the encouragement Crissy.

#14

Thanks Danny. I will make it to a meeting.

#15

Thanks Clay.

1 Like
#16

Thank you Britt Ann.

#17

Thanks Jason. It did help.

#18

Wow thanks everyone for the kind words. It was very helpful seeing this and knowing I’m not alone.

#19

Keep on trucking Mike
You can do it!

#20

How are you doing Mike?