I decided to follow the 12month rule recommended by our AA Old-Timers.
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What is the 12 month rule?
Obtain sobriety for 1yr. before seeking a relationship. Doesn't exclude friends, though! LOL
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Well thank goodness I have two years! We’re safe!
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Hope you can hold out for another 10.5 months....LOL.... NO 13 Stepping! Hahahaha
Unless of course it's a Tango...lol. I feel great about the fact that I get to find myself without other people defining it for me
Wait the yr. You have to be comfortable in the new you.
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After all, how can I tell someone about who I am if I don't even know? LOL I'm getting to know her... no cooties...hahaha
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There's a lot of reasons for that rule another one is if u get ur feelings hurt u might not b strong enough not to relapse within the first year
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I’ve seriously gone back and forth on this subject… I have several sponcee’s that this subject comes up often. Yes we don’t need the distraction from our recovery in our first year but we are also humans with basic needs and desires. I personally tell my sponcee’s that they should not make any big relationship moves in the first year, serious relationships or marriage ect. I also say if you are rigorously honest with a person that may have the same needs like a fun sober adventure or even a light physical relationship that fills need’s mutually and does not interfere with sobriety work 
I feel that sobriety can’t be empty of need fulfillment either or we will think it sucks and backslide. There is nowhere In the big book of the one year rule but also think it makes since. It’s all about being honest and putting sobriety and recovery first no matter what. Also the 13 step is less of a step and more a tradition 
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Sobriety first!
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I did the same. Unfortunately good lovin' has always been a weakness of mine. A good excuse to ignore red flags and end up in bad relationships. As a result I've been celibate for 3 years now with the exclusion of a single one night stand. It's been pretty rough but I refuse to settle for less or do random hookups. Such is life. I must say in complete sobriety of become a lot more picky which is definitely a good thing. In that time I have learned to love myself tremendously more than in the past and have learned to find great comfort even in the loneliest of times.
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Thank you so much, Brian. Indeed, this is a circumstantial situation; not a rule for all. Nobody said I couldn't date 🫠. LOL
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I'm right there with you, Josh... not going to lie, just because I've got great handwriting doesn't mean I'm looking to write an essay...lol
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It is your choice , with a different mindset and boundaries as a sober person good luck
No dating?
There will be plenty of drama waiting for you in a year. 
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Lol. I hear ya. I'm long-winded, a fault I think I will probably take with me to the grave!
Holly
Although its unpopular with younger people as it was with me when I was younger, it's great advice.
Prior to 2003 I had been in and out of so many relationships. I even shacked up with a woman that I met in the program of AA back then against the advice of Old-Timers. They were six of the most miserable years of my life.
My sponsor advised me to stay out of relationships for an indefinite period of time until I could figure out me and actually make myself more marketable. I stayed away from relationships for much longer than one year. I spent a long time learning about me and building my castle, so to speak. I got to a point where I wasn't really interested in trying to find someone.
I met the woman of my dreams online strictly by accident sometime in 2015. Today we are very happily married.
As time passes ,you're going to be looking through a different set of lenses every time. During the time that you are staying by yourself, you can spend a lot of time learning about you and what your likes and dislikes are. You can try some new hobbies and get active in different events that you've never tried before.
While I was staying out of relationships, I always had flying dreams, so I went out and earned my private pilot license. It was a great experience.
When we are new in sobriety we believe the lie that getting into a relationship is what's going to fix our problem but in reality it only makes it worse because we're not ready for a relationship.
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Man…I needed to see this post Brian. Thanks for sharing. I feel like I’m in uncharted waters here.
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