I developed a toxic relationship with alcohol during the pandemic. I’m doing a little better, but everyday is a struggle (I’m learning that mindful drinking doesn’t work for me…). I use alcohol to suppress my anxiety and cope with life stressors, but I know that’s it’s just not the best thing for me. I deserve to live and show up as my best self.
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You’re on the right track Kaity…. I suggest you attend AA meetings. You can download the app Meeting Guide to find meetings in your area. They have all womens meetings if that makes you more comfortable as well as zoom ones.
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Hey Luis, thanks for your reply. I’m curious how AA meetings work.. I’m more of a listener than a sharer and am nervous about attending one for that reason
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You don’t have to share you don’t have to do anything in AA but attend and listen 
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Courage, Kaity.
In my late stages of drinking , I also used it to get over anxieties I had about lots of things.
But what I have learned in sobriety is that alcohol limited my ability to deal with anxiety and made my depression worse.
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The pandemic and lockdown had a horrible effect on us all!
Stay on course and be a person you can be proud of.
Love yourself and forgive yourself.
It's a process that we are all doing every day.
Don't hesitate to reach out to most of the people on here. 99% are great.
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Good afternoon Kaity how are you doing? How’s the rest of your day going?
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Hello Kaity. One thing that will be helpful is to realize alcohol doesn't actually suppress the things we thought it did like stress or sadness. It in fact amplifies those, we've just become used to thinking that the alcohol was a solution we made it one in our minds. It's definitely not one though, as we find out later and then battle about internally because it's so confusing with what we see from every screen pretty much when it comes to the poison. We can be free of that for sure.
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Kaity, you don't have to share if you don't want to. Just go and people watch. See how it works. Say "hello". Have some awful coffee. Watch people be vulnerable. Draw some similarities until you feel comfortable enough to share. The women in AA really look out for eachother. Carve out a solid sober network, and heal.
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Admitting it is the first step! Keep it up! And if you go to an AA meeting and are not a fan, try another. Not all meetings are the same. I have been to a handful that I was not a fan and never returned, then I’ve been to many I loved and now go to regularly!
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I know the feeling in 2014. I was diagnosed with stage three colon cancer. I’m cancer free now but the chemo did quite a bit of damage I get physical symptoms from anxiety because I have to ignore what’s going on around me especially things that I’m not able to fixif you have a heart of compassion, this world is a very very bad place to be
Hoping you are doing well. I understand and hear you.
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Hi, Kaity…
The pandemic did a number on so, so many people. I mean, yes.
Am stating the obvious?
A recent study came out ( and I cannot remember the source now )…where I read this article…while I am sure it’s out there via various outlets.
Anyway, glad that you realize that alcohol is no good.
Yes, alcohol just increases anxiety…along with being a depressant.
It really IS messed up how glorified it is and to begin with!
I totally get having anxiety. Yes.
Part of why I would drink as much as I did.
Meetings, I have nothing against…while other resources, tools…have helped me more.
Things like meditation, yoga, exercise, writing, hobbies.
Wishing you well and hope that you find a group and / or avenues which work for you!
You can do it
And now you have the gift of awareness. The only way to solve a problem is to be aware of it. Congrats. You are going to be just fine. Life is 100x easier and more fun as a non drinker.
Nothing can take away what you have learned. More tools to slay the beast 