i stole some beat boxes from the store yesterday and walking home (it’s a two hour walk) i nodded off in the middle of road crossing the street. the pigs brought me home to my mom and she told em to keep me lol. apparently i hit her? she hit me back tho so i got what i deserved lol. i’m so disappointed and i hate myself. i feel like i deserve to die for being just like my dad. this is living h3ll and i’m in agony but i can’t stop, im incinerating the lives of those i know and i feel so guilty j wanna die but it’s like i’m a bystander to my own actions. i hate this. i hate myself. i hate drugs. and i can’t f/cking stop
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Sounds like rock bottom to me. Rehab… get to rehab. Check into a hospital and tell them you need a medical detox. If you keep on going the way it sounds you are… jail and or death are the only two things left. I truly hope you can find peace.
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It is impossible to change alone. I chose an inpatient rehab program for myself. It provides a safe stable environment to work on making the changes to live a more fulfilling life. I suggest taking a chance and finding a program that will help you reach your goals and move passed drug abuse.