I have been unable to quit drinking no matter how much I hate alcohol. I have battled with this addiction for over 15 years. I have done treatment programs and have had long periods of sobriety. I fell back to drinking in March and have been battling with it. Finally last week I went 3 days without drinking, then day 4 I drank and the next 2 days after that. The shame I feel for drinking again after I went 3 days sober is keeping me in a bad place and keeping me wanting to drink. How do I forgive myself? I know shame is the biggest thing that keeps me in the cycle and if I could figure out how to curb the shame recovery would be much easier for me. Any input?
Hey Maxie! I’ve relapsed and struggled with staying stopped before. I bet a large percentage of alcoholics/addicts do the same thing fact thing. It’s part of the disease. Stop beating yourself up about it. It’s just your disease messing with your mind. It wants you to drink. It tells you to feel ashamed so that you will drink over it. It’s time to stop listening to what your sick mind is telling you. How did you get long periods of sobriety in the past? What things did you do differently that helped keep sober? I’ll tell you what worked for me…AA. Have you been to any meetings lately? If not AA, how about some other program of recovery? Maxie’s program ain’t working. It’s time to heal my man. Living this active life of alcoholism is crap. Get out of the problem and come join the solution! You can do it! Give yourself a break and get back on track 

I can totally understand where you're coming from. The shame is the worst. It keeps us in a terrible place. And I like what the last person just said to you. We don't deserve to live in this place of Shame. I pray for you.
Hi Moxie, the shame can The so tough to work through. The thing that helps me when I’m feeling shame around some aspect of my alcohol abuse is hearing other people’s stories. Read some quit lit, go to a meeting, or listen to a recovery podcast. When I hear other people struggling or their stories that are similar to mine makes my brain realize “oh, I’m not alone, and I’m not the only one struggling with this.” You got this Moxie, keep checking in, that also helps.
Pray . Aa meetings pray more.
You can not do it a lone.go to any meetings and get help. Aa. Org for aa meetings. Churches are doing there own meetings in there own way.might help.
You may seek help.!!
It's a journey