I just got this app. Glad I found it. The past couple days I have been going through a lot of review. Tomorrow is my year anniversary. I would not have ever thought it possible and am still not sure what pushed me. I haven’t had an urge to drink, and I am very thankful for that. But I am coping with what is next. I still am going through extreme emotional flatlining. I don’t crave alcohol but I feel unfulfilled, if that makes sense. I don’t get enjoyment out of many things even if my life is improving by society’s standards. Just an odd, limbo type feeling.
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Praying for you Greg! Seek the Lord!
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Congrats on the milestone. I can empathize with what you're describing. In the past I'd engage in impulsive behaviors that weren't healthy, to try to feel alive. Now, sober from alcohol for about 500 days, I'm trying to direct that impulsive side to healthier, more worthwhile ideas. I know covid is making things weird, but maybe plan something new/out of the ordinary for the near future? Something different to look forward to. Even if it's just going to stay at some Airbnb in a city or a state over, for a change in scenery one weekend. Idk. If you have the means, and you can think of something you haven't done in a long time or at all, it might light a little spark to go do it. Best of luck to ya.
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Happy birthday Man!!! Celebrate that!!! It's a big one!!
I can relate to this...I was pretty much numb my first two yrs. accept anger. I was angry at God and myself more then anything. Otherwise I was just numb. But I had now else turn. I had tried and so many times and I was exhausted. I just wanted to be done. So I stuck with it and it's been a wild ride but I wouldn't trade it for anything!!!! It gets better 
Like Brittany said, finding the joy in the little things that used to make you smile helps you get through the first few yrs. and a lot of just sitting on Your hands!!! Following suggestions, pushing yourself everyday to make a continuous effort even when you don't want to! You won't regret it!!
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Hey, thanks guys. The input has been amazing and I love the encouragement. I love how I can observe life for what it is being sober. I have been getting into hobbies but work is a big part of my life. Work has helped me maintain sobriety but I’m ready to start balancing that out with leisure. I’m mostly scared of leisure. HeckI don’t want to smoke ribs again because I did that to drink beer for 4 hours haha. I know it takes time to find things to enjoy again. Patience has been a big learning curve in this for me as well.
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Congrats on the year. Everything you said makes sense. I’m almost 2.5 years and still feeling the same as you describe but the more involved I get in my program the more it helps. I also drank/used for 30+ years, I’m content with the idea it will take time.
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And Greg, I just got app last week and think is great too. It’s idea who’s time has come. And we are everywhere. Welcome and best wishes.
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