I keep slippin back into the bottle and Everytime I do it seems the worse happens. I lost my wallet last night after going out once again. I usually make it a good three weeks and the want to go have a good time creeps in.
What are you doing every day and hour to keep yourself sober?
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You're just telling yourself that you're having fun. In reality, you're skipping a portion of your life in a complete haze, forming no legitimate connections or making any lasting progress to your life. The only thing to show for the night is a numbness the next day, a diminished bank account with an occasional headache or soar throat from chain smoking. The friends you thought you made are still strangers and sometimes the dumb сгap you do the night before comes to bite you in the Ьutt, such as losing your wallet, ruining your reputation, or missing work. Reality sets in when you wake up in jail one day and realize you're not getting out for a long time. Multiple DUIs landed me 15 months in jail and that was my wake up call. I feel blessed it was only a DUI. Some people wake up the next day after drinking with way more serious charges or some do not wake up at all. To me the risk to reward ratio is disproportionately leveraged to one side, considering any fun you think you're having you can't even remember. Anyways, good luck, God bless, and God speed!
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I just work a lot. I need to find a way to become mentally stronger to say no to those urges
Exactly. I still find myself back there at least once if not twice a month
If it's at all possible it sounds like a 30 or 60 day treatment center would be helpful. Or maybe find an addiction coach/therapist?
If you could check in to a center then you could get past that 3 week mark and would have guidance every day to help you build a sobriety routine. I understand that not everyone has the time or money for that.
I had to attend meetings everyday for the first 90+ days and that is what got me to a saf(er) place. Whatever happens keep quitting until you stay quit! Sobriety is worth it and the more you have the more important it becomes!
My recent sobriety was accomplished by going to jail and not having access to alcohol and having plenty of time to think about how badly it has affected my life. But another time when I was younger I got sober on my own accord. And the fuel that kept me on that path was my higher power. At the time I had decided to read these Krsna consciousness books, which essentially is a form of Hinduism. I was raised Christian, but upon reading these books I found that there is only one God who is not limited to any religion. But the words in these books have much wisdom which I believe to be inspired from the Almighty. And much of these Godly qualities that are spoken of reject alcohol and drunkenness, and label it as a lesser form of existence. In Hinduism they refer to it as entering the mode of ignorance, the same mode as animal existence. So by reading these books everyday, it kept me on the path of sobriety. I had no interest at all, my only interest was to be conscious of God at all times and feel the eternal bliss of the spiritual realm. So this may help, it worked for me. I think immersing yourself in the Bible as well would be just as good. Whatever gets you closer to God, who has infinite strength and compassion to help you accomplish what you want.
Is losing your wallet “having a good time?”
Speaking from my own experience, I have found every “yet” slowly coming to fruition when I pick up. I too struggle at about week three. Here’s a secret, nothing lasts forever-the three week creepin craving. Also, you know you have those three weeks before you become susceptible. So maybe find a new hobby that gives you that “good time” feeling. I got into shooting and perfecting my shooting abilities, skeet shooting and being creative.
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