5 years sober. Relapsed. The struggle is real
It never goes away, each time you go out your brains neuropathways are altered and the each time will just get worse and worse. Find whatever recovery method works for you and stick to it
I'm sorry you relapsed, Fiddy, but I'm glad you are back. I had 7 years and decided to drink again...
Stay strong! You got this!!!
Not too many first niters around. It took me almost 20 years to come back to recovery after a relapse at 5 years clean. Everything is so different from how I've been picturing it all these years. It's not what I was expecting to find. I'm depressed and I constantly second guess myself still, and I'm back, over 2 years sober now. I second that motion, the struggle is definitely real. If I have to go through another cycle of addiction and using, there's no telling if there's going to be anything left of me, or anything to come back to that I'll even recognize. The stakes are the highest they've ever been, right now. Good luck, and welcome back to sanity. Hopefully you can stick around for a while.
You are still alive and you can start again.
I can relate, the struggle is absolutely real. But listen, you didn't lose the experience of those 5 years. You just had a stumble. You still have all that knowledge you built up, and now you can apply it to this next chapter. Not saying a relapse isn't serious, but the fact that you made it back is what matters. Glad you're here. Keep growing.