I’m struggling. I need a coach. I need a guide. I need someone. Please.
5 Likes
Do something busy. Distract yourself. You'd be amazed how cravings fade away when you are doing something. You can do it!
1 Like
Good morning
Are you still struggling?
Ok sister. Spill the beans. What are you struggling with?
Please don't dump and run.
We, all, are in this together.
Drinking and long time grief.
Ok . I get the drinking. Let's talk about the long time grief
Online meetings
Listen to some meditation or mindful podcast
Well, I’ve always drank “normally” if that’s even an acceptable thing. But, it wasn’t until about 2011 when my Moms Alzheimer’s started to become evident. My father was her caregiver and for the most part everything was not great obviously, but she was being treated and still enjoying quality of life.
It wasn’t until 2012 when my Dad got ill and died a month later so quickly. I had no chance to figure out anything about their estate, Mom’s options for care or anything. That’s when it got crazy. I moved my Mom into our house not knowing how to care for her, because when my Dad died, she just went so downhill at that very moment. Like almost unverbal, tired and so confused.
Eventually, I got her into a place nearby that took good care of her. This is while I had a 5 year old and a husband who worked tirelessly for us. No complaints there I assure you.
It’s just I became almost paralyzed by the grief and loneliness. I drank like a fish. I took care of my daughter best I could-she never missed school or any outings or projects.
I saw grief counselors, regular counselors and they were helpful in the moment. But, I had to keep coming home to a houseful of dead people’s things.
Then my alcoholic mother in law had to move in and disrupt life just as I was coming back to surface. It was Heck. While she was here, my Mom did pass away and she didn’t even say a word of condolences. Yes, there is bitterness still even after she herself passed away.
I guess it’s just grief on top of grief on top of grief.
I’m sorry to talking so much. Thank you.
2 Likes
It’s a lot Hillary. Thank you for sharing. As you process thru the grief, you need to take care of yourself. You’re only human. You did the best you could at the time. Ultimately you wish to move on from all of this past. You can. You have a choice to move forward and be happy. You deserve that. Your loved ones deserve that. I found the strength to move on by going to AA and working the steps with a sponsor. My recovery team also includes my physiologist, my AA friends, and other recovery oriented literature and podcasts. You can find freedom from all of this too. If not AA, then get involved with another recovery and do the work. You can do it
Thanks for listening.
1 Like
What's going on you are more than welcome to message me
We were talking about my grief and the difficulty handling it. I want to avoid it because it is so huge.
1 Like
Unfortunately, the only way to get through grief is to go right through it - but getting to the other side is so worth it - remember the grief is in the past and You still have a healthy and happy, sober life ahead of you! Please stick with it even when you think you can’t take another minute, just hang on !
3 Likes
Holy cow... That was a lot to go through. My condolences to you and your family for the loss of your parents.
1 Like
When I first went to rehab they told me an acronym for that F.E.A.R right now you're in the f#@k everything and runside of it and you have to be careful with that! Do you have a mentor? If you don't let me know
1 Like
You need to go to an AA meeting and find a sponsor.
1 Like
I do not have a mentor.
Are you willing to get one? Are you in any sober programs?