I’m suffering with extreme urges to use all this week. Everyday it’s been going more intense, instead of getting better. All the relapse prevention tools I learned at my residential drug treatment program aren’t helping. I fear I might relapse if these urges don’t leave me in peace. It all started when we had to watch this video called dope sick for group. It had graphic imagery, showing one addict sniffing dope and another addict shooting it up. I can really use any helpful advice right now. I’ve been doing so well here, I’m 5 months sober now, that’s the longest period I’ve been sober in the past two decades. I’m really getting nervous, it feels like I’m going to relapse. The only thing that’s stopped me is I didn’t get paid yet. I’m being brutally honest here.
You’ve done such amazing work already! Five months is great accomplishment! Can you talk to one of the counselors there? Do they resources for you? That movie was very triggering for you and you need to talk to a professional about that. You should be so proud of yourself for being aware and honest about this trigger. At the bottom of this app, click the lifesaver icon for Sobriety Help, then the Tele Help icon on the top right-ish. I totally believe in you, Rosey! Interrupt your behavior, breathe, go for a walk, even if it is to the next room and back, and call other resources for help. You can do this! You have already accomplished so much. 
Rosey, your not alone. Lots of us went through this during this phase of our recovery. It sounds like you may have hit what we call the wall. It’s where our sobriety growth seems to stop and we can’t get over this wall. Don’t be discouraged. This too shall pass.
For me, I remember when I hit the pink cloud phase. That was amazing. Felt so good. Then I hit the wall. Everything sucked! I wanted to drink, I was angry and life just wasn’t worth it. But then I really got honest with myself and got me a sponsor in AA. I really Jumped into the steps of AA. I did the first three steps with my sponsor. And that’s when the urges and the wall crumbled. I was seeing life differently. I had a connection with another human. I had a power greater then myself that was going to restore my sanity. I didn’t know God, but I felt differently that day. I actually was told I could call God, Gus. Great Universal Spirit. And so I did. Did that for about a year and a few months into my sobriety. My point is if I didn’t get honest and keep my mind open to the possibility of a Higher power I would have fell off the wagon a long time ago. Now I do get, on occasion, the thought of a drink but it’s not an urge. It’s just my disease telling me go ahead you can just have one. Look at those people, there having fun. I can now quickly laugh it off. I’ve learned to trust God. To also, play the tape. Fast forward my life after taking that drink or drug. I can see it being a disaster, therefore I don’t want to drink.
You might hear this around here, “lean in” and I can say I love this saying. Lean in to what your feelings are giving you. Breath in positivity and exhale the toxins.
You got this!