Trying to sit through a meeting should be an easy thing. I am able to hold conversations beforehand with a few other members. Yet as I sit here this sheer loneliness comes over me this sheer feeling of fight or flight starts to shift from my heart to my mind. Why am I here why do I stay what’s the point. These are questions that my mind asks yet I know that after 13 months I should be ok with meetings yet here I am struggling to stay. I want to stay I need to stay . It might be this quite moment where I should just listen and stay in the process and the solution. It’s a new meeting I’m adding to my program I might not be here tomorrow at least I am here in the present free from the past. Plus maybe I just wanted to text to feel that someone is there on the other end of this having this exact experience as I am. If you are I am here.
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As uncomfortable as it maybe speak out in the meeting. You might like it at first but then you’ll have a sense of calmness and total support.
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Ok
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Seriously it does work! Congratulations btw!!
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Thank you 
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That chatter and doubt in your mind…..that’s your disease talking. Whenever I’m feeling a little squirrelly, especially in a meeting, I know that’s exactly where I need to be. I may be bored, irritated, etc but I usually hear what I need to adjust my thought process. Hang in there.
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I identify without doubt. Thanks
TrySMART Recovery
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