I recently graduated from rehab. August 9th. It was my first time and the scariest thing I have ever done in my life. I jumped in with both feet and soaked up as much as I could. Processed as much as I could bare. I took a time out for myself and cared for myself and began to love myself. For the first time ever in life I not only existed but I was important. I began to discover myself. I ended the too many years long unhealthy relationship I was in. I was walking with confidence. I had never felt more present and alive. I was ready to live! I mentally prepared myself (or so I thought) for the reality of the struggles, especially financial, of making a new beginning. What I didn't prepare myself for was what being important meant. And how to make it reflect in my actions. Before this, I was that person who gave everyone rides, a place to stay, food from my house, money if I had it. Everyone came before me. And I was good with that. I thought that was my purpose. What I did not prepare myself for was how to speak up, speak out. What I wish I would have found more than anything is my voice. The same ones that depended on me before didn't waste any time. I have so many demands on my time and I can't find my voice to choose me. Awakened me feels abandoned and alone and not at all in control. I started using about a week ago. Though very minimal, it just makes the weight of everything else heavier. Awakened me is crying because she wants her life back. She wants control back. To be important again. To have peace and contentment again. Sorry for the lengthiness but thank you to all who took the time out to read.
Congrats!! I did rehab. Wanted to leave. Stuck it out. 18 months sober and counting
Congratulations Nani. You should always come first. Look out for yourself more in your choices and be confident in yourself . I am here if you need a supportive friend.
Hi Nani! Congratulations on graduating! It’s a huge decision to take your life back from addiction and it can be a rough road, but totally worth it! In regards to you using again, there’s no need to beat yourself up about it, just recommit to taking your life back and gaining back the control. Reach out to people you can trust for support and be honest with them. If you don’t have any/many if your life like that right now then keep reaching out here. There are plenty of people here cheering you on in your recovery.
Your strength & awakened self is inspiring! Thank you for sharing your journey
Nanni, you need to build a supportive family and sit back and wait for all of those people in your life that you gave all to give some back to you. If they don’t you have your answer. Resentment will sabotage you. Limit things in life that causes it. Today is a new day. You can do it.
Keep fighting the good fight. You got this!!!
Congratulations! Please go to AA meetings or NA meetings. They help me so much.
It’s a selfish program. This is all you now. Hang in there
Thank you all!! Things are getting a little better each day. I did find a couple 24/7 rooms via Facebook/zoom and sat in on one last night. Thank you all for the support!!
Other meetings include recovery dharma and smart recovery for example
I’d be happy to tell you about them
Bet you do a lot of embossing lol
I just reread when you got out of rehab. August 9th is my sobriety date!